*I am about to venture briefly into an area which you will probably say is a personal matter between two consenting adults and is therefore none of my business. And you are probably right. But I will share a quick thought anyway.
Recently, the respected Pew Research Center released a report revealing that 22 percent of the African American men who got married in 2008 married women who were not African American. It also revealed that in 2008, 9 percent of the Black female newlyweds married men who were not Black.
Most people consider the rise in interracial marriages a positive development signaling a breakdown in racism and negative stereotyping of Blacks. I am not quite sure or at least there is more to the issue than superficial first impressions would suggest. The reason I have doubts is because Black Americans have never undergone a true cultural revolution to rid ourselves of behaviors which may appear to be a result of individual choice but which actually result from internalized self-hatred and negative views of physical attributes of “Blackness” or “Africaness.”
One example will suffice: When I was a teenager (many, many, years ago) I attended a boat ride sponsored by a popular Black DJ in the city in which I was living. Although nearly 99 percent of the people attending the boat ride were African Americans, the disc jockey showed up with two blonde white women at his side. And he put on a show!
It was as if he was telling the black males “I got something better than what you got because what I have is white.” As far as the Black women were concerned, he appeared to be saying, “I don’t need you now that I am well-known and well-paid.”
The point of the story is that far too many Black people “chase after” white people or things European in nature because they are ashamed, hateful or disrespectful of other Blacks and things African in nature. They are in effect telling other Blacks, “I am better than you because I have a white woman (or white man, as the case may be).” Far too many prominent African Americans (from civil rights leaders to star athletes) are involved in these “for show” interracial relationships.
It is the above type interracial relationships to which I am opposed. These relationships represent negative bonds of unity rather than true love or greater harmony among the races. They harm Black people collectively because they demean and cheapen us.
At the same, I fully support interracial relationships in which two people are legitimately in love and decide to marry.
Nevertheless, I remain skeptical of the true benefit of interracial relationship entered into by a Black person whose primary goal is to run away from his or her “blackness,” distance themselves from other African Americans or proclaim the superiority of whiteness. And in too many instances, it appears to me that is what is occuring.