Larry Buford

I once wrote: “The conscientious person is the person who does what everyone else assumes someone else will do.”  I am very resourceful and result-oriented. I have high-energy. I am a creative and inventive person. I usually can find a way out of what seems to be no way. I am an artist. I see things around me that others are oblivious to. I am bold, and I believe in the axiom “The shortest distance between two points is a straight line.” No brag; just fact! I am who I am. Now I used all the “I’s” that I am at the risk of coming across as a shameless, conceited, self-centered individual only to make a point: I am hyperactive, and I refuse to make anymore excuses for it, even with all the flaws.

Most people who really take time to get to know me; know the side of me that’s proved to be – time and time again – a very caring and considerate person who is sensitive to the needs and well-being of others. Years and years of written feedback from superiors, peers, subordinates, and friends support this claim. It may be hard at times to keep a balance between serving others and pursuing ones’ own goals. Therein lie potential problems.

We live in a society where we look for gratification and reward for our achievements and successes. Remember getting that “A” in grade school and rushing home to share it with our parents? Well, for some of us that “rush” doesn’t stop when we get older. We still want and seek recognition and approval whenever and wherever we can get it. We want to share our successes.

When others take offense or show signs of envy, realize that being hyperactive is not a crime. Some occupations demand it (consider news reporters; rock stars; lawyers; and ordinary “lightning-rod-make-it-happen” folks). What makes it seem abnormal is when the hyperactive is flocked with those who are not (i.e. some close family and friends); whose motivations are more moderate and less intense; who may show contempt towards your tendency to overachieve. In time, good relations may erode to hypercriticism of the hyperactive which translates to excessive criticism and fault-finding. When a person is in hyperactive mode, it draws the ire of others as if they are witnessing a bull in a room full of Chinaware.

While the hypercritic may ask the hyperactive “Why does everything have to be ‘now’ with you?” The hyperactive may ask “Why do you procrastinate?” Feelings and reactions can then culminate into stress, frustration, disappointment, and misgivings; causing hypertension for both the hypercritic and the hyperactive – the former who feels the lack of sensitivity and compassion, and the latter who feels misunderstood, under-appreciated, and no matter what, it’s never enough. This has been my experience and observation. If it has been yours, take some time to evaluate your relationships and if necessary, seek out a licensed psychologist who may help you sort through it all. You may find a new freedom!

Larry Buford is a Los Angeles-based freelance writer. Author of “Things Are Gettin’ Outta Hand” (Steuben Pub.) www.amazon.com. Visit the author at www.editorialbylarry.com

(213) 220-8101 Photo available upon request