*It used to be that we would keep our business, our business. What happened in your family, household, neighborhood, was just between you and those involved. Today, everything is open for discussion, disclosure and distribution. From who you sleep with to what you have for dinner, inquiring minds want to know.
On the one hand, I’m encouraged that some are coming out of the Land of Make Believe and living true to who they are. On the other hand, I’m dismayed by the level of detail people are willing to share about their personal lives in public forums. Here’s the thing, there definitely is something called TMI (too much information). It comes in the form of details about sexual encounters, who wronged you and how, what your manager has done to ruin your career, your every move, emotional outbursts, and negative comments about celebrities and other people, among other things.
I believe that too much was kept under wraps in the past. People endured abuse, bad relationships, molestation, depression, postpartum, and more without saying a word, for fear of being judged, isolated, shunned, talked about, etc. However, today people are sharing things in a forum that, unfortunately leaves them vulnerable. They are vulnerable because people are basing their opinions on what is shared with no regard for the origin of the comments or information.
Why is it becoming the “norm to perform” (as Dr. Pam Love said) in public arenas? I’m no psychotherapist, but I suspect that we are raising generations of narcissistic people who need to be noticed to be validated. They watch people continuously get noticed, rewarded and go viral, for acting out and they want a piece of the pie. . .but, at what cost?
Brands, jobs, relationships and other things may be significantly and negatively affected, through the living of life out loud to the masses. My suggestion is that people take time to understand the impact of their “performance” on whatever they are trying to accomplish in life.
You don’t have to announce your break up on Twitter, curse your boss out on Facebeook, or tell the intimate details of your life out loud in a public setting to be in the in crowd. Perceptions is reality and it’s how people make decisions.
Don’t feel the need to perform.
Monica Cost is communications strategist, brand manager and respected corporate and motivational speaker. She is the President and Founder of Evidently Assured, a communications and brand management firm. Email her at: [email protected] Follow her via Twitter: @monicacost and Facebook.com/monicahairstoncost.