*Talk about dedication.

Nicki Minaj admitted in a recent interview that she was so desperate to achieve her dream that she was willing to die for it.

“I kept having doors slammed in my face. I felt like nothing was working. I had moved out on my own, and here I was thinking I’d have to go home. It was just one dead end after another,” she revealed to Cosmopolitan. “At one point, I was, like, ‘What would happen if I just didn’t wake up?’ That’s how I felt. Like maybe I should just take my life?”

But her dream wasn’t selfish. She wanted to make it work to help her family. She said praying to God for a big break was a normal thing. She wanted to buy a big house for mom and protect her from the rapper’s father.

“He would beg, cry, stalk us,” the FeMC explained.

“One time, he pulled my mother out of a car and dragged her for two blocks. After that, I had a phobia about unlocked doors. Anywhere my mother and I were, I made sure the door was locked, because that was my only way to protect her.”

Interestingly, over the summer, news came out about the rapper’s explosive relationship with her rumored boyfriend Sarafee Samuels. The two got into a physical fight, which left Nicki with a cut lip.