In Rowland’s interview with the magazine, the star reveals how she used to be nervous about sharing her real feelings “’cause I didn’t want anybody to judge me. But now I don’t care,” she says. “Judge me if you want to. And as a matter of fact, it won’t even count, ‘cause the only person who can judge is God.”
The star also delves into the references to former band mate Beyonce that everyone’s been chatting about on “Dirty Laundry,” the lead single from her fourth solo album “Talk A Good Game.”
“For a long time I wasn’t happy, but that had nothing to do with Beyoncé,” Rowland says. “That had to do with me trying to get my life in order and make better decisions for myself. I’m seeing all these wonderful things happen for her and I am happy for her. But I want a path. I want things to pop off for me, too. Not on her level but whatever my level is supposed to be.”
The “X-Factor” judge told ESSENCE that she’s finding her strength through workout with her trainer Jeanette Jenkins and sparring session with former boxer Martin Snow.
“I see the beauty in boxing,” she says. “It teaches me strength, physically but mostly mentally. I had to learn my strength, because for so long I could have been tougher than I was.”