steven ivory (2014)

Steven Ivory

*In honor of  Valentine’s Day 2014,  I wanted to offer some personal  insights  regarding the precious custodianship of that ever neglected lover,  your Self.

These nuggets  weren’t  gleaned from books  or  self-help seminars.  Hard-fought and road-tested,  they are the result of being in the trenches, often doing the same things  over and over,  yet  expecting different results.  In any case, over  time and experience, I’ve learned that:

Despite what you might have heard, YOU are the love of your life.

You’re the greatest person you’ve ever met.  You simply  haven’t been properly introduced.

Look Out for Number One.  It’s the only way you can help  Two and Three.

I’ve learned that clear, honest and succinct communication is kryptonite to misunderstanding.

If you simply listen,  they’ll tell you all you need to know about them.

Questionable friends  make questionable lovers.

Intuition is your superpower.  The more you trust it, the stronger  it becomes.

Patience reveals all.  However,  few  are truly patient.

Who your ex is speaks volumes about you.

The more doo-doo you put up with, the more you feel like doo-doo.

Remaining  in an unhealthy, unfulfilling  relationship is like drinking cheap wine. Continuing to sip doesn’t increase the quality of the wine, only your tolerance of what you’re drinking.

Self respect is its own reward.

It’s true:  fools DO rush in.

When the lies start is when you learn the truth.

When someone, through their actions, consistently tells you who they are,  believe them.

Stop lying to your Self.

To be “conscious” is to give thought to everything you say and do.    You want to be awake.

Your reality,  whatever it may be,  is your friend

Stop tolerating lesser people in your life in order  to feel better about your Self.  Your Self resents this.

To truly be loved, learn to love your Self.  Only then will you accept nothing less from anyone else.

When you like your Self,  you’re your best company.

The person who hurts you most is you.

The only person able to stop you is you.

When you truly accept your power,   every day is  exciting.

A great thing about going out with your Self is that they always get the check.

As long as your Self  is  somewhere around,  you’re never alone.

Never, ever give up on your Self.

No one is going to  “complete” you  but you.

Steven Ivory, veteran journalist, essayist and author, writes about popular culture for magazines, newspapers, radio, TV and the Internet. Respond to him via [email protected]