Jessica Keefe, celebrates after her husband, Michael Keefe, of Madbury, N.H., made it through the mud pit during the North American Wife Carrying Championship, Saturday, Oct. 8, 2016, at the Sunday River Ski Resort in Newry, Maine. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)

*I got married the first time when I was young and strong, and I carried my wife for almost 14 years.

Who knew that if I’d LITERALLY carried her for just under 300 yards, I could have won lots of beer and cash?  

Who knew there were annual wife-carrying contests throughout the world?  The genre’s name is a misnomer, as you don’t actually  have to be married to throw a woman over your shoulders and navigate a few challenging, muddy, watery obstacle courses on your way to the grand prize!

I haven’t managed to find one African American couple who competed this year.  Didn’t really surprise me.  White people can come up with the damndest stuff!  

This year’s North American Wife Carrying Championship took place last week in Newry, Maine.  (Maine.  That’s probably part of why no black folks were around.)

44 couples competed, being tested by an obstacle course that included log hurdles, sand traps, and lots of mud.

Peter Ver Ploeg carries Virginia Petrovek through the mud pit during the North American Wife Carrying Championship, Saturday, Oct. 8, 2016, at the Sunday River Ski Resort in Newry, Maine. The couple, from Portland, Maine, has been married for one year. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)

That’s another barrier for us.  Sistahs are NOT feeling the mud in the weave.  Nope.  

Story continues at EURThisNthat.