Sun, Nov 22, 2009
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Name:
SheriBeri
Comment: Great. Another study telling us we're undesireable and will die alone. I swear, we are the most studied race on this earth. Why don't they just leave us alone?
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Name:
bigfriend
Comment: I think this is great. As long as it is unbiased and all about the facts, great idea. They should do one about all the races- white, Asian, latino, indian- it would be insightful!
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Name:
Harleyquinn
Comment: LOL.........SheriBeri!!!!! No, I think they're still trying to cover their azzes from the Imus affair!
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Name:
McNasty
Comment: . . . will not only die alone but with hiv/aids or diabetes! I think it might get black women to focus more on their health and where they land on the scale and stop laying around with the guy you met at the club. Black women are dying in record numbers from hiv/aids (it is one of the most preventable diseases and most easy to catch) and in similar numbers are being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. Following a healthier diet and abstaining seem like farfetched ideas at the rate we're dying.
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: I still can't believe there are (according to the media) so many black women who may vote for Clinton over Obama. I just can't see it.:-(
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Name:
nightshift
Comment: SheriBeri, you had me laughing there girl, I hope it wakes people up especially healthwise. I always make sure I get a mammogram, Paps on time-all the time. I don't play that. Meanwhile-back-at-the-ranch...Story, are we supposed to vote for O'Bee because he's black? Please explain.
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Name:
Harleyquinn
Comment: Who are we supposed to vote for and why? Should we vote for Obama ONLY because he is an African-American? Shouldn't we look at how the canidates stand on the issues? What say you?
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Name:
Platinum
Comment: I agree Sheri we're always being looked at under a microscope for some reason or another. Although this series may be insightful it is often ignored, this is nothing new and yet the numbers continue to climb regarding our health which I think is far more important than the other issues at hand.
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Name:
BlkATLTop
Comment: I hate these reports where they use questionable statistics to draw their conclusions. Didn't EUR report last week (or some other news magazine) that the life-span of black women is longer than that of white men? If so, is this going to be mentioned in the NBC report? Probably not.
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Name:
nightshift
Comment: Harleyquinn, that's what I'm talking about. I don't know why but, I just don't feel O'Bee. Still, I try to make myself listen to him and the others, even though I pretty much made up already. This is a very important "Popularity" contest. They're going have to work for my vote.
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: No, we should not vote for Obama simply because he is black. If he was not running, I'd have to take a harder look at the other candidates. Because I could not vote for Hilary. Hilary only has Hilary's interest at heart and I don't trust her to make good decisions for this nation. I think it will be business as usual with her in office. She is manipulative and she twists the truth. So I guess I just cannot see what other people see in her (as far as wanting to vote for her). When GW stole the election in 2000...I knew back then that we were going to go to war with Iraq. So it was no surprise to me when he started fabricating excuses to go to war. If little old me could see through that from the beginning (as did Obama) how come Hilary couldn't? Personally, I will never forgive her for voting for the war. And it shows that for all the "experience" she claims to have, she can blow it BIGTIME. So maybe we should just give someone else a chance.
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Name:
Closet_Nerd_Girl
Comment: LOL @ SheriBeri! I will set the DVR. This will be very interesting.
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: Whats even worse (and why I feel so strongly) is that deep in my heart I believe Hilary did know that the war was a bunch of bullsh*t…but at the time, anyone who spoke out against the war or against the Bush administration was being vilified, and I think she voted for the war because it was the “popular” thing to do. I think she CAVED and she can’t lead a nation if she would do something like that.
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Name:
TGen
Comment: Story2tell, here, here. Very good explanation on why anyone should have reservations about voting for Hillary. For all Obama's inexperience (and he does appear green in a lot of ways), Clinton has just as much to be concerned about imo. But on the study, I so feel you SheriBeri. And it seems that since Black women in large part are doing well or at least better than a lot of groups, I would be much more interested in the difficult plight of Black men in this country. The NYT did a really good piece a while back on diving into what it's like to be a Black man in America, not fluff and ish you hear all the time, but a REAL look at their perspective. I would love to see that translated to TV, to get a no-holds-barred look at why [a lot of] Black men lag behind like they seem to do and how those who managed to escape becoming a negative statistic did so. I think this would be eye-opening for White America, many of whom believe racism doesn't exist, lol. Oh well...
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Name:
nightshift
Comment: Story, good point--everybody was back pedalling on that vote for war with Iraq. I was suprised by her vote, actually disappointed.
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Name:
Sigmatherunner
Comment: Can’t wait to the segment on how the portrayals of hip hop are affecting relationships (lack thereof ) between black women and black men.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: I plan to watch.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: Sig, much of this music does nothing but reinforce negative, derogatory stereotypes about black women and our sexuality. It is disrespectful and wrong.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: No other race would stand for their women to be called bytches and hoes in music and dance to it. That tells me that the people who make this music must believe what they are saying.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: Explore Black Women?!?! Where's that located near Antarctica?
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Name:
DCGG
Comment: Oh pulease Obama will basically be a puppet for some white person, lining his pockets meanwhile acting like he's "color blind"...least I know what the fuvk I'm getting with Hilary's old stank panky azz...but I'm still undecided...
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: Nope, don't explore me. Explore the institutionalize racism and disparities that gave root to these listed inequalities and injustices. I already know who the hell I am. But I digress.
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Name:
SpecialK
Comment: When I first read the story I was a little insulted. Why are we being explored like we're about to become extinct? I know there are many issues facing AA's in general so why single out black women? Why is this shyt even being put on tv? What is their fascination with us? What they need to explore is why all this racism/hatred/poverty still exists in this country.
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Name:
papertrails134
Comment: First of all, you black folks gotta stop believing everything you hear. According to these stats the African American race is led by black women and the women are sickly, which means,the men don't stand a chance in hell. How come they won't do a report about why African Americans are the only people on earth that gets world recognition? Yeah whitey rules the world but African Americans are known throughout. Black women, don't bite the apple that this serpent is tryin to feed you and don't bring it to your men either or we all gonna be effed up.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: I think someone needs to take a closer look at the plight of black women. We have numerous commissions on black men, but there's little regard for the challenges that women face (i.e., racism/sexism, etc.).
As for black single women, people act like that is a death sentence and that we are all out here trudging through life while waiting for someone to validate and make us complete by marrying us. I don't believe that is the case with most sisters today. That is not to say that there's anything wrong with the institution of marriage. It may not be for everyone -and married or single - life does go on.
When I was growing up, I attended church with a single, professional black woman who had her own place, etc.
She seemed to have it going on. Well, she listened to her mother/sister who told her that she should get married and have a child. They also told her that "God" had sent her a specific man.
Well, it wasn't long before he was beating the hell out of her. Today, she's a shadow of her former self. Overweight, unhappy and struggling.
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Name:
McNasty
Comment: Nightshift a lot of black women are voting for hillary because she's a woman, why can't one who doesn't have time to pay attention to all the rhetoric being slung around by all the candidates vote for Obama because he's black?! Each person has their own reasons for the way they vote and Lord knows we aren't at a loss for candidates telling us what they think we want to hear. Personally I want someone that isn't already sullied by Washington politics, that has made firm choices with his own issues and that, regardless of how new he is, has no problem taking a stand on popular or unpopular issues (plus I just love how stearn he was with some knuckledhead journalist recently during a campaign stop - he does have it in him).
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Name:
khufu
Comment: okay first of all, I hope the producers, writers, researchers and directors are going to be Black woen.....
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Name:
khufu
Comment: 2...SHERI they wont leave you alone because a smart, intelligent, cuturally conscious, spiritually conscious, African aware, sound minded, healthy Black woman gives births and raises goddesses and gods....
you control a woman and you control a nation
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: I don't trust Hilary. She's dishonest just like her husband. And I'm not one to vote for a person because of their race, but we must admit that some black people have difficulty seeing a black man in a position of such power. Forget racists, THEY don't trust in his abilities.
I visited relatives in the Mississippi delta over the weekend. During one conversation, an elderly relative who has lived a very modest life there for over 80 years stated "A n***a ain't never going to be on top." Though the comment was not in reference to anyone in particular, it was telling. That was what they were taught from the jump and it is deeply ingrained in their psyche. Unfortunately, some of the younger ones have the same mindset.
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: Thankfully "SheriBeri" set the tone for the comments. It's just another "look" at Black women -- the mothers of born and unborn African children. As we all know, Africa is the birthplace of humanity and it is still the only place rich and overflowing with natural resources that continue to rule the world (minerals, diamonds, oil, and SO MUCH MORE). So this is just an effort to break the Black family down. Let's not let it work folks. White women flock all over Black men -- why don't they do a story about White women dating Black men? That's much more realistic (and the stats prove it) than Black women wanting White men. Some Black women may "end up" with a White dude because society's trying to push White men on Black women, but that's not where the chemistry flows. As far as Hillary Clinton -- she is full of it and is too entrenched with groups like AIPAC (American Israeli Public Affairs Committee) to take seriously. She's wrapped around their finger. Her husband was governor, then president for 8 years, now she's been a senator for about 7 years, and she's shooting for president. Forget about it. We'll be fighting wars all over the world for Israel if she gets in -- and we'll be giving more than the $3 billion we already give to them for "holocaust" related issues. Please spare us Hillary Clinton in the White House. We'll be in BIG TIME trouble.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: SheriBeri, those were my exact thoughts...another platform for black men to tell the world how black women are the scourge of the earth. I wish they'd stop talking and move on. And why won't they address the rash of white men killing their women and children? It's all designed to make white folks feel better about themselves and give black men and nonblack women a chance to gloat. I knew this was going to be a topics for news headlines eventually. Everybody has a right to be concerned about their respective communities except black women.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: such exposes or doc s area form of propaganda not to report facts but to create and influeuce fact and reality.....
an interesting study on propaganda is what the Nazi's did with it.......
these shows are designed to keep Black folks on the edge and distracted
not saying there isnt SOME truth to them but with an informed, analytical and reasning mind, one can read between the lines...however, most viewers....the lease common denominator, falls for it over and over and over and over and over and over and over again
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Name:
khufu
Comment: why doesnt NBC do a historcl doc about the Black women who fed and still do feed and raise white children? they were called Domestic Engineers or Servants
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Name:
khufu
Comment: see this is the least common denominator mentality that serves as enemy to the race.......MELODY is the target market of the propagandist.....yt knows if they plant the seed people like MELODY will suck it down
cant you see...
Fact 1) NBC is owned by yt
2) Brian Williams a white man is doing the show
3) SHeriberi sets the tone and makes a general comment about how this wil be another study
4) MELODYCOOL says this (how and hen and where did anyone say that Blck men were involved in this?)
Name: MelodyCool
Comment: SheriBeri, those were my exact thoughts...another platform for black men to tell the world how black women are the scourge of the earth.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: gingerg, the people who make that type of music are pleased as hell to watch black women being diminished in everyone's eyesight...to justify why every other woman is supposedly superior to black women. The only thing they forgot is that we fight harder when facing adversity while they run scared.
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: DON'T FALL FOR THIS NONSENSE, FOLKS. PEOPLE OF AFRICAN DESCENT -- AKA BLACK FOLKS -- ARE THE MOTHERS AND FATHERS OF THE WORLD. DON'T FALL FOR THE SETUP. DON'T LET THEM HOOK, LINE, AND SINK US!
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: papertrails134, if the women are sickly aren't the men sickly as well? Some of these "sicknesses" are coming from the men. As long as Black women are portrayed in a negative light...it's fine with black men.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: Song of the day Public Enemy's "Don't Believe the Hype".
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Name:
khufu
Comment: If there are any criticisms of this program, it should be toward the producers of perpetuators...NBC
any other blame is a distraction.....
again: how many of the people working on the program at NBC wewre Black women or men?
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: TRTR, and why won't they discuss the majority of white women and nonblacks having babies with black men are now raising them solo?? While Black women have peeped the game these women still believe the hype and are falling for the trick hook line and sinker just because they are made out to be better than Black women. Now a growing number of their mixed offspring hate Blacks and black men in particular.
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "MelodyCool," the Black man is NOT your enemy. Don't fall for it.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: echo effect on the boom box
Name: Southernbelle
Comment: Song of the day Public Enemy's "Don't Believe the Hype".
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Name:
khufu
Comment: NBC should also offer programming that shows the historical and contemporay strengths of Black woen and men.....indivudally and collectively...institutionally..
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Name:
khufu
Comment: In politics and sociology, divide and rule (derived from Latin divide et impera) (also known as divide and conquer) is a combination of political, military and economic strategy of gaining and maintaining power by breaking up larger concentrations of power into chunks that individually have less power than the one implementing the strategy.
In reality, it often refers to a strategy where small power groups are prevented from linking up and becoming more powerful, since it is difficult to break up existing power structures.
Maxims "Divide et impera" or "Divide ut regnes" are traditionally identified with the principle of government of Roman Senate. This attribution is not entirely reliable, insofar as the Roman policy mainly aimed to unite the conquered nations both politically and culturally, under Roman rule.
It is, however, borne out by the example of Gabinius parting the Jewish nation into five conventions, reported by Flavius Josephus in Book I, 169-170 of The Wars of the Jews (De bello Judaico) [2].
Likewise, Strabo reports in Geography, 8.7.3 [3], that the Achaean League was gradually dissolved under the Roman possession of the whole of Greece, owing to them not dealing with the several states in the same way, but wishing to preserve some and to destroy others.
In modern times, Traiano Boccalini cites "Divide et impera" in La bilancia politica, 1,136 and 2,225 as a common principle in politics. The use of this technique is meant to empower the sovereign to control subjects, populations, or factions of different interests, who collectively might be able to oppose his rule.
Machiavelli identifies a similar application to military strategy, advising in Book VI of The Art of War [4] (Dell'arte della guerra [5]), that a Captain should endeavor with every art to divide the forces of the enemy, either by making him suspicious of his men in whom he trusted, or by giving him cause that he has to separate his forces, and, because of this, become weaker.
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: We have to educate ourselves to understand WHY we're constantly targeted. I could give a whole list of people, but I'll start with Dr. Joy Leary who was recently on Gil Noble's "Like It Is" television show. Check out this link: http://video.yahoo.com/video/play?vid=1450675.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: Lost souls like MelodyCool continue to help yt's divide and conquer us.......
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Khufu, I don't need NBC to tell me what I already know. All that show will do is exacerbate problems. You should see how black men jump up and down every time they see or hear of Black women being slammed. King magazine named Imus "Man of the Year"...now we know what that was all about don't we? Trust me, Black women know the deal which is why we are struggling and "preparing" ourselves on every level to go it alone...and to reach back to help other young Black girls any way we can.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: TRTR she will be discussing her book "Post Traumatic SLave Syndrome."
Love the book. Always recommending it.
Gil is still doing his thing?
A major influence on my life he was.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: does Melodycool speak for all yalll sisters out there?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: the lesbian mantra...
"Name: MelodyCool
Comment: Trust me, Black women know the deal which is why we are struggling and "preparing" ourselves on every level to go it alone...and to reach back to help other young Black girls any way we can."
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: khufu, learn to read between the lines. The article mentions "interracial dating" being a hot topic. What does that mean? Rejection of Black women by black men?? Did you watch that show on Tyra where even black men said they didn't want black women and made complaints about hair texture etc? White women have been on talk shows saying the same thing black men repeat to them. THIS is what creates the hatred...black men giving license to everyone to pile on Black women...in the hopes that no one will notice what they are lacking themselves. We have been taking this shyt in for a long time!
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Name:
khufu
Comment: inter racial dating (not saying I agree or disagree with it) could be:
preferential
the fact that you see it only as rejections speaks to issue youre having......
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Name:
FiveMore
Comment: Excuse my French, but #@$* msnbc/nbc!
If the Imus debacle never hit them in the pocket, we would still be the nameless,faceless "nappy headed/hardcore hoes" in America/world.Although I am from the Deep South,I am able to see what "they" are trying to do!NBC yall aint fooling me!hmmmm,I am up on things.
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Name:
mcctusk
Comment: dang melody>> what brother done pizzed you off? I went back and reread the article and the only time it even mentions the term 'black men' is in reference to a panel discussion on hip hop lyrics. It is the last two words in the article. Which pretty much sums it up: yt america is officially declaring the black man irrelevant and inconsequential to the lives of black women (and therefore, black families), oh, except for the discussion of hip hop lyrics. While meantime, folks like MelodyCool only needed a tiny hook to ride the 'down with brothas' train. I wonder how many black unit families will be shown during this week-long extravaganza. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with people who date interracially or homosexuals, because I am pro love. But I do have a problem with HOW MANY black people have bought into the notion that black men and women are naturally at odds with one another. Oh the insanity!!
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "MelodyCool," again, the Black man is not your enemy. You're just around the wrong Black men. You've also been duped into believing what the White media puts out there to create distrust and disunity within our ranks. Also, King magazine probably has a Black "cover" but is actually owned by Whites. Remember, Black men and women are stronger together than apart. But if those in power can keep us thinking negative about one another, we'll never realize our strength. "Khufu," I push her book all the time too and gave about 50 out as gifts over the years. Excellent book. Hopefully more of us will realize the need to focus on our ancient African history and enslavement in America to get a better understanding of how we've gotten to this point.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: khufu, black men in relationships with nonblack have more interest in promoting those other cultures. This is the ultimate divide and conquer which no ones wants to address. Now kids from those unions are joining the fight against blacks too since they do not consider themselves black in fact. Go read this thread: -->http://www.thumperscorner.com/discus/messages/50 52/538.html<--- Here are a few sample comments: "A recent study showed that Black males in interracial pairs tend to vote the "way of their partner's family"--which was usually a female characteristic in the past. They're still Democrat for the most part, but not necessarily concerned in the least with black issues per se. Their concerns are the issues facing their mate's family." "Black females of college/childbearing age have left in record numbers due to the interracial boom in California, so there's a noticeable imbalance of black "youth". The males are noticable, but the females are hard to locate now." "Mixed unions dominate here and the men pretty much follow the politics as I told you of the wife's family. One very noticable fact, I think someone else mentioned this, is the fact that bi-racial children here do not identify as "black" like they did in the days when I was coming up. White women have support groups for these mixed kids and you never saw such confused, anti-black kids in your life! They teach these kids not to be black."
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Name:
mcctusk
Comment: Now I understand the rantings of Daryl James...
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: khufu, all you can do is call me a lesbian for "ACCEPTING" how black men feel about Black women. Whether you like it or not, some of us would rather do things that are "beneficial" rather than worrying about snagging a black man. Your mantra is: black women never did anything to "help" me!
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Name:
mcctusk
Comment: You know, I grew up during the time when black women were taught that "you can do it all" and that "you don't need a man, girl". So now I have a bunch of girlfriends who have great careers, children (most have boys) and you guessed it...no man. A few are divorced, but most never married. Wonder how things would be if we were taught that we need to nurture and preserve our families...
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: khufu, I say BS about the use of "preferential"! This is the black man's way out...using "preferential". So can't Black women be "preferential" about who they'll support too? I have reason to be very suspicious of any black man hyping "preferences" are the reason for dissing their own community. Don't try to turn this around and make it about "ME" being rejected by black men. Many of us have no interest in pursuing relationships with them either, and don't have the energy to sift through the crap. We know it's "imperative" to lift up black girls, provide scholarships and other forms of support and encouragement. Unfortunately, black men with "preferences" don't give a dayum about their fellow black men. They just want you drooling and envious over some trash they call "trophys" and you fall for it hook, line and sinker. Black women are reacting by purposely turning away from black men and pushing them on to nonblacks since this is ALL they want anyway. Soon you won't have any other recourse. Yes, we are that fed up!
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Name:
khufu
Comment: oaky
Name: mcctusk
Comment: dang melody>> what brother done pizzed you off? I went back and reread the article and the only time it even mentions the term 'black men' is in reference to a panel discussion on hip hop lyrics. It is the last two words in the article.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: mcctusk, black men often tell white women they are "at odds" with Black women to justify their own obsession. Our race is on the decline numberswise and black men are all too happy to contribute to this problem. Go read that link I posted from Thumperscorner and read what a black man (who understands) saying the same things I discuss.
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Name:
Dovelyone
Comment: I think we should watch because if nothing else, if we see something that needs to be challenged, we can go by DIRECT reference to make comments and send INFORMED OPINIONS to the network instead of going on 2nd/3rd/4th/5th person heresay spouted on internet message boards.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: and now, back to the program...
we should write letters to NBC expressing concern and maybe picket for one day?
again, I wonder how many Black folks contributed to the production of the program?
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "MelodyCool," get it together, girl. For a third time, Black men are NOT your enemy.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: AGREED DOVE...
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Name:
khufu
Comment: TRTR Cocaine is a serious drug
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: TRTR, stop telling me it's the media forming all my ideas when they're coming mainly from black men directly! Yes we are stronger together, but you know and I know WHERE the real problem lies. The obsession black men have with wiping out the black race as soon as possible. I'm also angry that they are contributing to the growing racism we receive because they teach their mixed kids to despise blacks too. Think about and "reflect" on ALL of this.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: While I don't agree with much of what Melody is saying. I do respect her frustrations on what she perceives as diminishing black males. The media has hidden images that constantly perpetuates the misconception that the black man is on the verge of extintion. Since they can't physically tear the black family apart as they've done in the past. They use media outlets to instill fear into our communities. They do so through the penal system (unfair punishment), this new found DL phenomenon (all of a sudden the few good black men left are gay), statistics (more black men in prison than in college=LIES), Movies (interracial co-stars). The media is tarnishing the image of the black man so aggressively that it's easy for one to be ill-informed about the truth. This shyt's been happening since we landed here. This whole berate the black man and uplift the black woman syndrome. This is a ploy to destroy our family/culture. As a black woman, I feel that I am only as good as the black man standing with me. Melody is only speaking from her experiences, just like many women who haven't found that brother that will uplift them.
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Name:
Calidee
Comment: IS NBC Nightly News the best source for a study on African American women?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: LOL SOUTHERN...what else did you read in the story that the NBC show will focus on? Was it just Black males?
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: mcctusk, it takes "both" sides to nurture and preserve families. Please don't forget this. It's crucial for ALL women to gain financial independence and it's not taught to Black women solely. There's another problem lurking in the background which black men do not like airing.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: she needs to change her consciousness...her heart
her world
her surroundings
her choices
what she puts into her brain
if she fills that way about all Black men then everytime she meets one...guess what?
Self-fulfilling prophecy....
Name: Southernbelle
Comment: Melody is only speaking from her experiences, just like many women who haven't found that brother that will uplift them.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: The series will cover a wide-range of topics - from their role in the '08 Presidential race, to the increased health-risks that have been of longtime concern.
that's what it says.....
but watch this turn into a Black male bashing thread
LOL man, some yall are lost.....NBC is doing a series on Blck women and
the Black man is being blamed and you dont see how Black folks can be their own worst enemies
MELODYCOOL seek therapy
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: Personally, I'm not bothered by black men with white women. It's their choice and if some of them don't realize or appreciate the beauty and strength of black women, that is their problem. I still believe that most black men prefer women of color.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: khufu, you can't come on here telling somebody to seek therapy. We all have different opinions. While we may not agree, do we have to be disagreeable?
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "MelodyCool," I don't know any Black men who hate themselves and the Black women in the lives. As far as I'm concerned the problems we have within our community exists from the miseducation we've received for centuries. Do we really expect our enemy to educate us with what we need to know? As Malcolm said if they don't TREAT us right, why do you think they'll TEACH us right? Sending our kids to a school system that will miseducate them is cultural suicide. We don't have our own educational institutions, so we get what we have today -- miseducated, misinformed, misled adults. We have work to do -- and blaming each other won't get us back on track. It'll only derail us, so let's get focused, get it together, and step things up to take us to the next level of unity.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: I hear Melody on the financial peice. I have a paternal grandmother who relied solely on her husband for sustenance. He's passed on and she's trying to make ends meet with her social security check and her brother's.
Her husband was the head of the household and what he said went, even if it was not in her best interest in the short or long-term. My grandmother married this man after having my father out of wedlock in the forties. Back then, that type of thing was frowned upon. Though he was a beautiful child, she caught hell (she was 20 when he was born). She married his stepfather and never really lived that down.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: Well, the world is full of options. That applies to black men as well as black women. Now, though I prefer brothers, I would date and/or marry a man with some other kind of color if he knew how to act.
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Name:
mydchomegirl
Comment: NBC needs to include the HIV/AIDS EPIDEMIC in D.C. D.C. has the number 1 HIV/AIDS Cases in the nation and 9 out of 10 new cases are black women! This is sad and quite alarming! In most of the cases women contract the virus through hetersexual sex. We got to be MORE careful and watch out for the DL boys and the drug users.
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Name:
TMan
Comment: Interesting timing. Today it was reported in the news the new report of HIV rates among black women in DC is still over 70%. Leading the country in its rates.
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Name:
Harleyquinn
Comment: Name: MelodyCool Comment: gingerg, the people who make that type of music are pleased as hell to watch black women being diminished in everyone's eyesight...COSIGN!!!!!
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Name:
khufu
Comment: LOL GINGE me telling someone to seek therapy IS MY OPINION...hmmmm
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Name:
khufu
Comment: wow for me the issue is less about the content of NBC's "alleged" or scheduled program but about NBC and how it produces such a program
for me, it would be more productive and enlightening to discuss the content of the program after it airs
mean REALLY how many times can GINGER< MELDOY and whoever else keep saying the same thing here on EUR every damn day
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Name:
Closet_Nerd_Girl
Comment: >MelodyCool- I appreciate your passion, and on a certain level I can understand it. But I have to ask you- Do you honestly beleive that there are NO good black men available? Do you honestly beleive that single black women are "doomed" to be alone? If not black men, then who are single sisters supposed to be with? I'm not being facetious, I'm really curious.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: for instance the story clearly (WATCH THIS) indicates that health will be one of the topics right?
Okay how many of you Blck women are overweight? let's talk about that.
No, you want to gossipp about Black man and bash Black men
oh Im sorry MELODY if youre obese or unhralthy Im sure you will find a way to blame it on a Black man.......
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Name:
khufu
Comment: A man or woman is what he/she thinks......
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Name:
Harleyquinn
Comment: Name: mydchomegirl Comment: NBC needs to include the HIV/AIDS EPIDEMIC in D.C. D.C. has the number 1 HIV/AIDS Cases in the nation and 9 out of 10 new cases are black women! This is sad and quite alarming! In most of the cases women contract the virus through hetersexual sex. We got to be MORE careful and watch out for the DL boys and the drug users.....COSIGN!!! CAN ANYONE ON HERE TELL ME WHY THE BLACK FAMILY UNIT IS BECOMING EXTINCT??? 70% BORN OUT OF WEDLOCK!!! AFTER A WHILE WE MIGHT NOT KNOW WHO IS RELATED!!! WHY AREN'T PEOPLE GETTING MARRIED? SISTAHS WITH AIDS ON THE RISE!!! WE ARE FFFFING OUR RACE INTO EXTINCTION!!!! I KNOW KHUFU HAS AN ANSWER!!!! :)
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Name:
khufu
Comment: GINGER that's some funny sheet come to thoink of it...why dont you ever pose that question to MELODYCOOL
While we may not agree, do we have to be disagreeable?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: HARLEY the answer is...
My people persish for lack of knowledge
My people perish for lack of vision
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Name:
Closet_Nerd_Girl
Comment: Please heed Southerbelle's advice and "don't believe the hype." I for one refuse to believe that black women are in as dire straits as some folk would have us beleive. This puts me in the mind of when people in Europe beleived the world was flat (contrary to what you were taught in elementary school, only Europeans thought that way. The Africans were light years ahead of the rest of the world and knew better. But I digress....) until Christohper Columbus accidentally proved them wrong. People will swallow a lie as long as they are willing to be fed the lie. (Want a more recent example? G Dubya Bush and the Iraq war. Hillary drank the Kool-aid on that one along with a bunch of others.)
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: Black women are contracting HIV/AIDS at alarming rates because of our trusting tendencies. If a person looks good, some find it hard to believe that the person may be infected. In addition, there is so much pressure on single sisters to have a man. Presumably, anyone will do just so that you can say that you have one - even if it is what the old folks used to call a peice of a man.
Then, there's denial. Some sisters will ignore obvious signs of infidelity, etc. and continue to sleep with a lover, husband, etc. unprotected because they don't want to be alone and/or want to maintain the image of a solid family.
And let's not forget those unfortunate souls who go to the club and leave with anybody so that they can wake up in the arms of a man. I know one thing, sisters better learn how to love themselves in a spiritual way (and I don't mean this religious church mess). I mean, in a deep, comforting way that lets you know that you are better than that.
I would be the last person in the world to deny that these physical needs are real, but there's a season for everything.
And I must also mention denial. In the church, folks often speak of "the flesh" as something evil or dirty. It gets people twisted because they know they have needs, but feel guilty about acting on them. Yet, they can't seem to stop themselves. Such women are very vunerable and must stop viewing their sexuality as the sum total of who they are or ever hope to be.
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Name:
MistaO
Comment: Serious "big ups" to the Black folk who see through just another attempt by those in power to further divide Black men and women. As if we'd need any futher help in this. Trust, all these other groups know, and know well, the ramifications "IF" Black people were to put our relationships, and mainly FAMILIES back together. They know it, and fear it greatly. Nothing gives these people greater comfort than being able to point to the misery and abject situations many Blacks find ourselves in. And believe me, they have no intention of correcting the stuff they've done to get us to this point.....IE excessive prison terms for crimes many yt men are left free for and the list goes on. But at the end of the day, no one but us is keeping our family units all jacked up. Some real simple truths must be adheared to concerning families and we wouldn't have all this mess going on. Put the father back in the home and the majority of "our" issues would be eliminated.
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: I'm not messing with MelodyCool today. You have already made her mad, Khufu. Now, you want to get me all up in your mix. Not today.
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Name:
beegirl
Comment: I know a lot of you are down on this special already, but I think topics like heart disease and breast cancer NEED to be addressed in this kind of forum. Maybe if we talk about them more, our women won't die from them as much. NOT talking about them hasn't done us very much good. And highlighting the gains Black women are making in business and education on prime-time TV is so much better than the only time I get to see someone who looks like me on TV, it's New Yawk or some Flavor of Love contestant.
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Name:
shell72
Comment: Will you people lay off MelodyCool. She is just like a lot us tired of being told if we voice an opinion we're putting down black men. NBC probably got the idea from all the thousands of black women bloggers out today and journalist myself who continue to write stories about our lives, which mainstream media ignores. One has to realize as a black woman that the future of our daughters are at stake. They are being told by their own men they are not good enough. These young girls are being told in their face black is not beautiful, unless it's light skin with long straight hair. And BLACK men are the ones pushing this.
I'm glad the mainstream media is doing this, something has to be done. Too many of our young girls are still falling in the cycle and becoming unwed mothers and HIV/AIDs victim.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Closet_Nerd_Girl, no I'm not saying there are no good black men. But for decades our best have traditionally gone to nonblack women since they are deemed superior and black men must have what white men opt for. Black women have "various" options including waiting/pining for black men. I feel all this waiting/pining gives them power as they perceive themselves better than Black women anyway if they are halfway decent and even if they are not. My point is to "accept" the situation and to never be used by men who promote hatred towards my race/gender. There would be far less resistance towards interracial dating if it wasn't based primarily on a black woman's features or skin color. Lurk on any interracial site for black men/white women and it won't be long before you know how black men really feel. Most of them feel "any" white or nonblack woman is superior to black women, but they never say white men are superior to them. They encourage dissension between black and nonblack women as well. I'm just going to say it: I believe they want to harm and subjugate black women any way they can so long as their "preferences" continue to enjoy a positive image no matter how they conduct themselves personally.
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Name:
Closet_Nerd_Girl
Comment: >MistaO your last sentence pretty much summed it all up. At the end of the day, the only people who can help our situation get better is US.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Khufu...of course I have no choice but to be obese and unhealthy because I'm a Black woman right? And Black women are all the same, but black men should be seen as individuals along with nonblacks. I see so many gargantuan, wide-legged walking black men it's a shame. I can only imagine how good it feels believing only one-half your race is messed up. Dream on.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Everything you said, gingerg: --->"I know one thing, sisters better learn how to love themselves in a spiritual way (and I don't mean this religious church mess). I mean, in a deep, comforting way that lets you know that you are better than that."<---NOTICE the first thing people want to sling at a Black woman is "that's why you don't have a man." Like that's the be all and end all. I'm so glad I'm not a slave to walking dycks. And the best revenge is now nonblacks women are their slaves and they are being sucked under and left with children to raise alone. See how plenty of them are now showing up on talk shows bytching about the same things we "used" to. LOL!!!
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Name:
Closet_Nerd_Girl
Comment: >Melody, thanks for answering my question. I agree with you that there are black men who feel the way you have described (I grew up around a few like that and know of one personally), however, I believe that they are the MINORITY. I truly believe that the MAJORITY of black men, including "our best", love us and want us. As far as options, do you mean by "various" that black women should stop dealing with black men all together? Turn to non-black men? Remain celebate for life? Become lesbians? If there is a real concern about wiping our race (I beleive you mentioned that in a previous post, but if it was someone else I apologize), then wouldn't that be counter-productive? Instead of "waiting/pining" for a black man, sisters can step outside of their comfort zones and discover good black men that they would not have noticed before. Personally, I see nothing wrong with a black woman wanting to be with a black man and waiting for (and recognizing) the black man that is right for her. That's what I did.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: apparently GINGER
Melodycool stays mad with every Black man
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Good post, Mista O. But let's face it many of those fathers do not want to be in the homes. You know the lifestyles many choose and really want to lead. Therein lies the problem when the woman can't turn a blind eye to everything. This is also why many women are contracting AIDS.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: gingerg, please don't help Khufu. I got him cornered now! LOL!!!!!
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Name:
gingerg
Comment: And black women get blamed for the dl syndrome. I recently heard someone say that brothers wouldn't do that if there wasn't so much homophobia in the church. Well, what is the church comprised of (90% or better)?
You grown, so do you. However, you don't have the right to infect or place my life at risk because of your personal desires. If you want to do something same genderwise, speak on it and let me make my own decision about whether or not I'm going to stay with you.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Thank you shell72...you get exactly where I'm coming from with this: -->One has to realize as a black woman that the future of our daughters are at stake. They are being told by their own men they are not good enough. These young girls are being told in their face black is not beautiful, unless it's light skin with long straight hair. And BLACK men are the ones pushing this.<---- Perhaps this is why some are so desperate they cling to any crumbs from black men thinking they have to "prove" something even if they end up destroying themselves in the process. Black men are always talking about Black women being single mothers yet they readily marry and play daddy to the children of white and nonblack women like it's nothing and they're "proud" and grateful for the opportunity to serve them. This is why I don't buy "it's the media's fault" because much of this stuff is coming straight from these men themselves. By telling the world they do not love, care for and will never protect Black women it places us in a vulnerable position...and this is why we are willing to fight and stomp like hellcats because black men are not behind us. They make it clear that they have their "preferences" yet expect us to "still" step up to the plate when our assistance is called upon. It ain't happening.
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: Ladies - RELAX. This segment is not positive for black men. On the contrary, it indirectly highlights how low the black man has sunk and that black women have taken the lead in areas of academia and business. Let's be open about the health issues and use the information to get healthy.
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Name:
NYCsoul
Comment: 2 questions: Who are raising these black men to think this way about black women? Aren't most black men from single black female headed households? So why are they turning to nonblack women?
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: Rehema Ellis is a sister and believe me, she knows the deal.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Closet_Nerd_Girl, I, too can understand why Black women might prefer black men. But once they really start to understand most black men "prefer" nonblacks to them a change in consciousness occurs. By various, I mean they can wait/pine for black men, date interracially themselves but have the same standard for ALL men, control their own sexuality...become celibate or get friends with benefits. I don't promote lesbianism because I've never been one and it's not an option for me personally. Or they can dedicate themselves to working tirelessly to uplift our Black girls as this problem with colorism is deepening with black men and most nonblacks know this and exploit this fact as well. My sole concern at this point is preparing our Black females for the road ahead. Be sure to check out: http://www.whataboutourdaughters.blogspot.com
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: I hear and feel you Melody. Black women are phenomenal. We know it and they know it. We just have to mobilize, strategize and get the right image out there.
In the words of songstress Ledisi, "It's Alright” check out her CD, listen to that song and relax.
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Name:
SheriBeri
Comment: I hear y'all on the healthcare tip so why couldn't they just do a segment on our HEALTH ALONE? Why they need to talk about stuff like if we like White boys or not? I'm sorry, I would accept it more if it was about our health but since its not, it seems like just another put-down if you ask me.
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Name:
MetroScribe
Comment: Gingerg: Co-sign w/ you 200%!!! ESPECIALLY with this: "And I must also mention denial. In the church, folks often speak of "the flesh" as something evil or dirty. It gets people twisted because they know they have needs, but feel guilty about acting on them. Yet, they can't seem to stop themselves. Such women are very vunerable and *must stop viewing their sexuality as the sum total of who they are or ever hope to be.*"
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: We are sick and stressed out because for years, we have unconditionally supported and coddled these sorry, insecure black men (our brothers, nephews,fathers, husbands, etc.,) and put ourselves last. If you read "The Miseducation of The Negro", you will understand why black men hate black women. It goes way back. Dr. Phil did a segment once about parents that coddle and give their children everything and when things don't turn out right for the child, they lash out at the parent. The concept is the same regarding black men and balck women. We continue to support them and we are the very ones that they turn on.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Closet_Nerd_Girl, I'm very concerned about our extinction. Surprising one black man on an interracial site actually asked the men how they felt watching their mixed offspring continue to breed with whites and while we are slowly being wiped out. Most of them love having these "exotic" kids and also pits them against other Blacks when we do not honor them as "new and improved" Blacks. If you didn't, please read that thread on Thumperscorner...I posted the link above. Also lurk on some of these mixed-raced sites to find out how protective they are of whites and disdainful/hateful towards Blacks. You can email me at melodykewl@aol.com and I'll provide some links if you want. Some white women have said their black men want their sons to align themselves with white women and their daughters are gifts to black men. However, more and more their daughters are choosing white men too much to their black daddy's consternation. I've read blogs from mixed girls saying their fathers are really feeling the heat because they are turning towards whites and it's tearing them up. One mixed race woman said some black fathers feel inferior to their own kids and that's what they get.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: NYCsoul, it doesn't matter who's raising them. Black men see what white men have and therefore accept that Black women are an inferior product. Other influences seep in besides what's received in the home. Basically, these men feel inferior themselves and white or the next best thing is a temporary boost to their self-esteem. Some even strive to be successful just to be able to "afford" nonblack women.
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Name:
Renetta
Comment: To: Khufu: Did you ever answer my question about what you do for a living, whether you're involved in a political organization and if you've ever thought about running for a poltical office. On this piece, I get very wary when white america chooses to give a dam about the state of black women - seeing how they are the largest contributors to the negative state we're in. Fck em.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: deedeeVon, "The Black Woman's Anthology" by Toni Cade Bambera seems like it was written yesterday. This shyt's been a long time coming. It really bothers me when black men say Black women don't support them. That's our biggest problem...supporting and understanding them too much because we "both" faced the same problem. However Black women kept on plugging because we HAD to! Now we're on a mission.
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Name:
McNasty
Comment: 'does Melodycool speak for all yalll sisters out there?' I'm too good at speaking for myself - besides - there is a nasty slant to some of the things she says!
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: If there's a nasty slant on my comments maybe we should consider switching handles, McNasty. Yours says it all.
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Name:
Harleyquinn
Comment: Name: NYCsoul Comment: 2 questions: Who are raising these black men to think this way about black women? Aren't most black men from single black female headed households? So why are they turning to nonblack women?..........COSIGN!!!! SOMEONE PLEASE ANSWER THIS QUESTION!!! And... I think the breakdown of the family goes back to the lack of fathers and/or the PERVERTED images of hip-hop/gansta rap that are played and/or shown to our people everyday!
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: I don't necessarily agree with every single thing Melody says...but I am feeling her on much of it! I'm sure there are some good brothas out there but looking at the relationships I've been in...and looking around me at my friends, relatives, co-workers etc...we black women are the ones holding down our families...yet I have heard how we don't support our black men, and I wonder who decided that was the case??? Some body please tell me because it seems to me that we have supported them and continue to support them sometimes to our own detriment. I'm sitting here trying to figure out when do they ever support us?
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Name:
MetroScribe
Comment: Sometimes, I fear there's no pleasing us. We say we're invisible, and now that there will be a focus on Black women and education, health and for once--presidential candidates seriously battling for Black women's votes--there's a problem? I'd like to see how the stories are handled, first. But generally speaking, what's wrong with focusing on Black women? There are "special reports" on all types of people, all the time: Seniors, teens, you name it. So why the hostility before the first report is aired? Lastly...folks mentioned Black women's images in hip hop: It makes me sick, but on another level it may speak to another truth other than the fact that what entertains you says more about you than you'll ever admit. It's the fact that you have all of these negative, hypersexualized images of Black women (which Black men have all too willingly and gleefully participated in) at the same time that Black women are making great gains in educational attainment, business, the professions, etc. It would seem to me that it comes from the same tradition of men using sexualized language to demean women and/or bring women "down a peg" who are too independent, too outspoken. I've heard women called the b-word and (a white favorite) the c-word. And Khufu, you provided an example of the other thing by calling MelodyCool a lesbian (or "you must be a lesbian"). In your quite expansive vocabulary, you couldn't come up with another way to express your different view? Seems you have a bit more in common with white males than you realize.
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Name:
Harleyquinn
Comment: All you have to do is turn on an episode of Maury Povich to see how LOW SOME of us have fallen! These men go around sleeping with all these women, make babies and leave! Who taught them to disrespect women like that????? I even read about a professional football player, Travis Henry I think, who has NINE children with NINE different mothers!!!!! Now that's some crazy shyt!!!!!
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Name:
Renetta
Comment: I'm sorry but to me the underlying message of this 'STUDY' will be: 1) black men ain't shyt that's why there so few who go to college 2) black women ain't shyt that's why 70% of ya'll are either divorced, unmarried or separated 3)black men and black women will either all be in jail, uneducated, dying of aids, breast cancer etc. It's a hopeless message with no solutions. What do I mean by solutions, well we could deal with part of the aids problem by NOT WAREHOUSING BLACK MEN IN JAIL FOR SUBSTANCE ABUSE WHEN WHITE MEN WHO USE COCAINE DON'T GET THE SAME SENTENCES, SUPPLYING BROTHERS IN JAIL WITH CONDOMS SO THEY DON'T COME OUT OF JAIL SPREADING AIDS TO BLACK WOMEN. This is what I mean by white america being willing to discuss problems THEY CAUSE with NO SOLUTIONS. Like Dr. Butler of TSU says - when people can't figure out a solution they return to dicussing the problem. I'M SICK OF DISCUSSING THE PROBLEM. I WANT TO SEE SOME CONCRETE SOLUTIONS TO THIS MESS WE'RE IN.
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Name:
TGen
Comment: Most of the comments I've read reiterate my earlier sentiment and actually deepen my desire to see a sincere, well-done expose on Black men, to turn the lense on where the convo inevitably ends up anyway. I would love to understand why some Black men make the choices they make, as well as expose some of the barriers this society has intentionally placed before them, and yes even the interracial angle is intriguing. I say getting to the heart of the community (the Black men) would go a loooong way in finding out some of the things Nightline is "studying" about Black women. Maybe one day...
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Name:
shell72
Comment: No problem MelodyCool. I had to put this out to my own daughter while watching the new Chris Brown/TPain video. At the beginning the video they gawk at a thick brown girl butt and figure, but who does he choose to make the object of his affection, the hispanic/biracial looking girl. I see young black girls destroying their hair by putting glued weave tracks, because black boys love girls with long hair.
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Name:
mamamay
Comment: I dont think the respect is there for the black women. There are many black women who have given their 100% effort in going to school, being a parent and holding down a job too. Many use their own income to manage tuition for education when they can find the classes that they need in timely slots. Many white women have husbands of color supporting them whereas they can go to classes when ever and get the classes they want. Which often takes up the slots only available to many working black women. Now this does not appear to reflect in the polls. I know.. I have been there. It appears the study of black women in this context is done in a negative manner, and says very little in a positive perspective for Women of Color.
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Name:
MistaO
Comment: One thing, I've seen many posts from a couple of you concerning what you believe is "typical" behavior from Black men as it relates to "not wanting" Black women ect. One thing to remember, for the last roughly 20-30 years, many of these men you debate and may hold these negative images of Black women were raised by whom? You guessed it, a single Black mother! Just think about it. How catty are women typically, then you raise a boy up in an environment sans a father to "counter buff" those emotions typically exhibited by a mother (usually a young untrained womam) and that boy takes those same "I hate that b****" attitudes into "manhood" and thus treats women accordinly.......I can't say it enough, nothing will change for Black people until we divorce ourselves from the negative, self hating, divisive, thought processes placed on us (yes going all the way back to Slavery) to keep us divided and controlled. Sadly, Melodycool and others with these clearly hate based emotions directed at Black men are worse for our community than any outsider could ever be (and far more damaging to boot!)....Look, between Black men and Black women, it you want to boil it down deep enough, there is more than enough blame to go around. But sitting around pointing the finger and carrying on aint gonna solve anything or put us back where we need to be.....Quite simply, there are plenty of Black men out here who have, prefer and stand by Black women. Additionally, there are many Black women who have chosen to date and marry outside their race as well. So again, enough of crying over someone who aint in your bed anyway. We need to quit falling for skewed statistics, lies and half truths concerning "us" and get back to thinking, supporting, protecting, and loving each other the way our great grandparents did it, and we wouldn't be debating silly stuff like "good hair" and supposedly "bad hair". We'd be doing like all these other groups, and sitting at the table WITH OUR OWN deciding how we are going to divvy up the money we just made by supporting one anothers business.
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Name:
MetroScribe
Comment: MistaO: So women are typically catty? And you were saying something about people should stop being negative and divisive?
"How catty are women typically, then you raise a boy up in an environment sans a father to "counter buff" those emotions typically exhibited by a mother (usually a young untrained womam) and that boy takes those same "I hate that b****" attitudes into "manhood" and thus treats women accordinly......."
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "MelodyCool" might be better off finding sites that support positive Black relationships. It appears she seeks sites to support her viewpoints. Sister, there are many sites that give love to Black relationships and Black people. But you have to be open to accept it. Are you ready? Are you there yet?
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Name:
FiveMore
Comment: MistaO,I totally agree with these sentiments.You aint said nothing but a word!WHY ARE BLACK MEN MISSING FROM THE "FAMILY"?It is not a conspiracy, but a reality!MISTAO:"I can't say it enough, nothing will change for Black people until we divorce ourselves from the negative, self hating, divisive, thought processes placed on us (yes going all the way back to Slavery) to keep us divided and controlled."
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Name:
bigchassie
Comment: what time this come on tonight?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: MELODY LOL am I conered? LOL how so?
love ya Melody Cool
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: co-sign metroscribe. I was thinking the same thing. That's some real mess right there. *SMH*
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Name:
khufu
Comment: again you Black man bashing sistahs has turned the NBC progam into a blame Black man for everything session.....
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Name:
McNasty
Comment: MelodyCool we should switch then it won't be too noticable when you get to man bashing.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: lol No Renatta I didnt answer...gimme an email address and then I ll screen you then I will reveal my secret identity
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Name:
khufu
Comment: MELDYCOOL can you intlligently and in an informed manner speak to how the mainstream media continually produces programming the highlights the dysfunctions of and in the Black community?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: METROSCRIBE well I never called her a lesbian. WEhat I identified is a phrase commonly used by women who are lesbian to justify tjeri hatred and /or disdain for Black men and their justification for the "recruitment" of young Black girls......
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: LOL it kills me that anytime a black woman expresses a less than favorable opinion of black men she is “bashing” but if a black man expresses an unfavorable opinion of black women he is trying to “enlighten”. Personally I don’t feel the need to bash men, I just state the facts as I see them…and I would hope that we could all meet someplace in the middle somewhere and we could begin to resolve some issues.
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Name:
McNasty
Comment: MistaO there is no typical behavior for black men or women most have just forgotten that in order to attract someone decent you have to be decent. It's not a popular thought but I'm not going to give the black woman credit for holding down job school while raising children. It's what you have to do when you reproduce by someone who has no staying power and that isn't just limited to black men. I also don't subscribe to black women creating the down low man cause of sermons in the church. Thats the excuse they give instead of taking responsibility for what they know is foul behavior. If a man has a taste for another man that's on him and it's also on him to let the woman he's sleeping with know. We make the relationship between men and women more complicated than it is and blame the wrong ones when things don't go as planned and the relationship ends. We all have to be more careful about who we let in our lives cause you can not make me believe that all black men break camp when commitment is spoken of, I refuse to subscribe to the notion that a successful sister has to do it on her own and I'm also not going to feed into the feminazi mantra about not needing a man. We all need to be more real with each other and in our relationships and make more of an effort at understanding. I was raised by one helluva black man and had two fine brothers and out of 3 brothers in law only one was the pure shyts. We've got to stop attacking one another and making excuses to treat each other bad and if you find yourself in the never ending cycle of bad relationships - take a few steps back and change the bait you're fishing with.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: one thing about me though, while I am always ranting about my Africaness that is a good rant.
Turning this into a Black man bashing "discussion" is sad. Some yall, in spite of your jobs (working for the plantation)
cars (not paid for nor manufactured by a Black person)
homes ()not paid for)
are LOST AS HELL!
how in the fook do you justify Black man bashing based on the topic of the discussion?
MELODY speak to YOUR health and the ill health of Black woman based on obsesity
speak to the state of the collective Black woman as voter and the relationship between that and the next Presidential election
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Name:
khufu
Comment: who said that? and what does that have to do with the NBC program....
Name: Story2tell
Comment: LOL it kills me that anytime a black woman expresses a less than favorable opinion of black men she is “bashing” but if a black man expresses an unfavorable opinion of black women he is trying to “enlighten”
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Name:
khufu
Comment: Besides STORY it is the relevancy and appropriateness of the comment...okay she said it...now....can she or you speak to the other issues that the NBC program will deal with?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: here speak to this:
On Thursday, Ron Allen will take viewers to South Carolina -- the first southern primary state -- and ask the question: Will race trump gender or gender trump race? In South Carolina, black women made up nearly 30 percent of all democratic primary voters in 2004.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: speak to this and look at why Black men arent represented in higher numbers from both sides of the coin:
1) racism
2) lack of passion and desire from Black men
see if the POV is solely blaming it on the Black man for not wanting higher education without looking at causes and reasons then it is bias...
"Nearly two-thirds of African-American undergraduates are women. At black colleges, the ratio of women to men is 7 to 1. And that is leading to a disparity in the number of African-American women who go on to own their own businesses."
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Name:
khufu
Comment: Here NBC should deal with the challenges Black women who are culturally conscioous and desire to express that consciousness through their fashion sense have a hard tie in corporate America
speak to any of these MELODYCOOL
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: TRTR, any site promoting positive relationships with black men and women are usually infested with white women. In fact, a black man on an interracial site even highlighted this himself. And the black men are all too grateful to promote and defend them when asked to leave. No other race of men would behave like this. White women are always talking about their pages on Black Planet and BV as well. In fact, these women swarm Mahogany love even though there's a special section for interracial dating. There's something they hate about black men and women coming together...and black men love having women at each other's throats over them.
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: Khufu, I will wait until I have watched the NBC program to pass judgment on it. In fact, I would have to go back up in this thread to figure out who first stated that the program was going to be all about black male bashing, because I don’t remember how the topic even came up. My previous comment was in response to some of the things being said by males on the board (at least as I interpret it) that seem derogatory towards women (ie the catty comment, and the idea that we are raising our boys to hate us) yet no one has accused any of the males on this board of being women bashers…OK maybe that sounds like it has a whole nother meaning, but you get what I’m saying. And if I am interpreting things incorrectly then please set me straight…because really, I want nothing more than for black love to be successful. But it can’t be if women aren’t allowed to express their points of view without being disregarded as “male-bashers”
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Name:
khufu
Comment: is MELODYCOOL paid to attack Black men?
who screwed wih your head Melody?
did a yt girl take a man or two from you?
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Name:
khufu
Comment: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh STORY
MelodyCool did....
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Khufu, sounds like you're the one on cocaine...and it is a "terrible" habit to acquire: Lol!!! Gotcha! ---METROSCRIBE well I never called her a lesbian. WEhat I identified is a phrase commonly used by women who are lesbian to justify tjeri hatred and /or disdain for Black men and their justification for the "recruitment" of young Black girls......
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Name:
khufu
Comment: STORY I dont have a problem with anything YOU said...where did you get that?
here is the statement that started the Black man bashing
Name: MelodyCool
Comment: SheriBeri, those were my exact thoughts...another platform for black men to tell the world how black women are the scourge of the earth. I wish they'd stop talking and move on.
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Name:
Story2tell
Comment: Khufu, I didn't really think you had a problem per se, but I was making myself clear nevertheless. I'm just on some kinda roll today with posting...I usually don't post but every once in a blue moon :-)
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: Khufu - SHUT THE FU&K UP YOU IGNORANT BA$TA$D! Unbelievable! You must be a catty gay man b*tch.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: SheriBelle never ever said anything about Black men either
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Name:
khufu
Comment: DEDEE....suck my strongly heterosexual left nut while your mother sucks the other one
now, is that ignant enuff for you :___)
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Name:
khufu
Comment: MLODY this plus all the other anti Black man bashings do qualify you as lesbian
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Name:
khufu
Comment: MELODY
were you raped? molested? dumped? to what can we attribute your strongly anti Black man sentimants...seriously..
DEEDEE.....im not even gon go there
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: Khufoofoo - All of your anti Black woman bashing speaks to your apparent catty gayness ; )
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Name:
MzTee
Comment: I plan to watch. Especially the health segments. I think this is key to highlighting black women's health issues and bringing more attention to the disparity in health care and treatment that black women receive.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: Dubm Dumb DEEDEE im not anti woman......im anti MEOLDYCOOL's stupidity and yours......
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Name:
khufu
Comment: DEEDEE Oh Im far from being gay...probably screwd several of your female family members at one time in mu life......
LOL
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Name:
DOne
Comment: As someone already stated, there is more than enough blame to go around so what's the point of the continued finger pointing. Everytime a black child is born outside of love, both the black female and male are equally to blame. Both are equally to blame for the fvcked up mentality of many of our young people. Any man who has had no positive experiences with black women, should look inside himself because he is probably the problem. The same goes for women who only have negative experiences with men, the fault just may lay with you. Also, every statistic I've never seen states that over 90% of black men who marry, marry black women so we need to stop buying into this idea that most blk men are marrying white women; it's straight BS. Most studies show that blacks tend to watch much more TV and go to the movies more often than other groups. I think one of the best things we could do as a group is to turn off the TV set and save all the money we'll spending on cable and going to the movies. Maybe we would be less likely to buy into all the hype. For those of you who say that your perspectives are based on what you have experienced, then again, I say maybe the fault lays within you and the poor choices you've made if all of your experiences have been negative.
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: Mel - It's no use continuing this dialog here in eurworld. You are up against incredibly insecure, catty self-hating individuals like Khufoofoo. I ask that you watch the show and see who comes out smelling like a rose.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: Oh I love that I can be so human sometimes as I temporarily bathe in the ridiculessness of human folly......
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Name:
khufu
Comment: DumbDEE this makes me think that someone the show is a competition in your sick azz mind?
Name: deedeeVon
Comment: Mel - It's no use continuing this dialog here in eurworld. You are up against incredibly insecure, catty self-hating individuals like Khufoofoo. I ask that you watch the show and see who comes out smelling like a rose.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: Oh my goodness, what's going on in this thread. We got Cool people acting Nasty. Brothers and sisters fighting and calling each other gay slurs. Nuts getting sucked on. And last but not least, the black man's image has been dragged through the mud. Time for some R & R.
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Name:
amethyst
Comment: As I've stated before, I respect Melody's perspective if it is derived from her personal experiences because my views on Black man are based on my personal experiences. I tend to be an optimistic, "Keep hope alive", spiritual person who seeks the positive while acknowledging the reality and the negative. I just choose not to park by the negative. I personally know a variety of Black men, and I choose to focus on and give props to the ones who are handling their bizness. I'm not a researcher so I don't have the statistics on the number of Black men who have married or are dating non-Black women. I propose that the percentage may not be very high, it's just that the spotlight is put on the ones who aren't with Black women. For instance, I doubt the percentage of Black NBA or NFL players with non-Black wives is extremely high, but any media (including Essence and Ebony) lets you know the ones who don't have Black wives. At the end of the day I refuse to give up on my brothas or to bash them. There are too many out there who are for real for me to give up hope. Besides, it still takes male and female to procreate and keep our Black community alive.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: SEE DEE....why do you think the program SHOULD be about making Black men look bad?
DEEDEE are you too a love scorned Black woman? like "MEL"
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Name:
sdedee
Comment: I do agree with some of the opinions on the board. Yes, it has been shown that it is a myth that there are more AFAM men in prison than college, but have they checked the street corner? This may sound mean or funny but I am dead serious. I am sick of the excuses. I am not and was not born into any type of wealth. I worked my way through college with the help of grants and loans. What is the real excuse. Too lazy, tired, depressed, feel entitled to freebies? Brothas that are stagnant, whats the problem! Yes, its hard out here, have I experienced racism, yes. It comes a time when you have to say enough. The yt is not stopping you from going to school, training, you may have a hard time finding a job but get some education in the mean time. It wont kill you but hanging on that corner will! There are some good brothas out there but Women already outnumber men so, things still dont match. And for the record, stagnant sistahs you need to step it up also!!!!!
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Name:
khufu
Comment: the NBC program...the NBC program..not Melody Cool's personal experience
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Name:
deedeeVon
Comment: Khufoofoo - Everything that comes out on your post screams GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
Melody, MzTee and DOne - Great comments. Melody, I'm headed to amazon.com to order that book. sounds interesting. Please forgive me for letting Khufu take me there.
I'm done, I have a headache gotta go to yoga class tonight to release this stress.
I really do love you all, my black sisters and brothers but we are all collectively screwed up and we need to fix it. Have a good evening everyone.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: New song of the day India Arie "Brown Skin".
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Name:
khufu
Comment: DEE DEE to the defense of Melody's exuality speaks lesbian...
Me gay. Nah. I am secure in my deep dark masculinity
Ommmmmm
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Name:
SweetieDarlin
Comment: McNasty> Amen---however it isn't always the bait, the fish could be kinda crazy too LOL. MelodyCool, although I don't completely agree with the dismal a.s.s.essment I see where you are coming from, also I can't debate your point because this is based on what you have seen and heard (kinda scary though.) I have been blessed to experience very wonderful loving black men all my life, father, brother, cousins, godbrothers included and I am positive there are many more like them but I do have friends who can point out based on their experiences, feel what I see is the exception. As far as this program is concerned I will watch it with a jaded eye because I do know that a lot of pieces like this skew the statistic and point a poor picture when that isn't actually what is happening or better yet it isn't happening in the large number portrayed in the media.
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Name:
KILLERMEG
Comment: SOUTHERN-LMAO!
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Name:
khufu
Comment: there you go
SWEETIEDARLIN
with a jaded eye because I do know that a lot of pieces like this skew the statistic and point a poor picture when that isn't actually what is happening or better yet it isn't happening in the large number portrayed in the media.
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Name:
MzTee
Comment: Khufu...I don't believe what MelodyCool believes. My experiences and observations of black men happen to be different than MelodyCool's. I know too many wonderful black men who are the antithesis of her perceptions. I am sure there are black men who think negatively about black women like MelodyCool claims. But, I strongly believe that is ONLY a small fraction of black men. Conversely, there are black women who think negatively about black men and praise the virtues of white and other non-black men. Either way, it's too much generalizing on how black men and black women truly feel about one another based on the opinions of a few. Bottom line, black men and black women have both been complicit in the decline of the black race. It no more the black man's fault than it is the black woman's fault. We're equally accountable. And until we ALL realize this and stop placing blame on another and do the work that is necessary to heal and strengthen our community, we'll continue to see the decline.
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "DeeDeeVon," stop trying to go there with gay remarks in an effort to think you're getting to someone. That's a very weak tactic. "MelodyCool" is completely against Black men in her remarks. I think "Khufu" held out for a while. Everything I've written and others always gets turned into something negative about Black men by her. I advise her to go to some positive sites -- and she writes that White women are posting the positive comments. That's just UNHEALTHY and illogical thinking -- to find a way turn EVERYTHING into a negative.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: khufu, nope none of those things happened to me. I merely "accept" the situation between black men and women for what it is. A smokescreen. Like I said with that acceptance comes a change in consciousness.
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Name:
bigchassie
Comment: wooo!!! somebody done ate too many chitlins this weekend! lolol!!!
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Name:
MistaO
Comment: Reading these posts, is it any wonder we will not rise again until the return of Christ? Black folk have been, are and unless we focus on what's tuely important (Black love and the family) we will continue our monopoly as the worlds laughing stock. Again, much love to the Real Black men and women out here who still love and respect one another and the rest of these loosers need to just check out. Some of you are just far too damaging to the Black community and need to be purged and shunned by Blacks who have a full grasp on reality.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: Melody, please don't accept that as fact. Black relationships are alive and well. Maybe you haven't found your soulmate yet. Maybe your soulmate is not a black man. Take a good look at yourself now and say "Self, what am I doing to contribute to my situation." Because, there are plenty of us who love and are loved by black men. You deserve love also. Peace.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: MistaO, I agree with much of what you said today. But, why we gotta purge them. Agreed, some of these sentiments are damaging but can't we just put them on one of those mind boggleing machines and change their ideologies. LOL.
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Name:
Sexee
Comment: Divide and conquer... Pit the old against the young, the male against the female...
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Name:
Sexee
Comment: Black men you must understand that a contentious woman is very dangerous. What should you do with her? Pray and keep it moving.
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Name:
MistaO
Comment: Hey Belle, I say purge because like it or not we are, and have been, in an undeclared war for our lives and mental health since the conclusion of Slavery....It's real... So that being said, if you are engaged in a war, you have no choice but to do away with any of your enemies, especially those within your ranks. Enemies within are 10x's more dangerous and detrimental than any external enemy could ever be. I say it seriously, these people are dangerous and hamper all attempts we may make to "free" ourselves as a collective. These people are akin to the slaves who informed on the Blacks who were planning escape or rebellion. They suffer from deeply seeded self hate and sadly, many are worse than any White person could ever dream of being. They also poison their own children with the same self hate and negative thinking.
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Name:
Sexee
Comment: MistaO ~ I agree, you must extract your enemies.
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Name:
Southernbelle
Comment: I just feel really bad for my sister. I believe she's surrounded herself, whether intentionally or not, with some negative people. I know there's good in bad in every race but my experience with black men has been more good than bad. As a matter of fact, I can count on one hand the bad. But, you are correct sometimes we can be our own worse enemy.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: TRTR, white women are flooding those sites and black men gooble it up. You know this and so do I.
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Name:
khufu
Comment: I am the Extractor
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Name:
TRTR
Comment: "MelodyCool," I totally disagree with you and I also give up. And not because you win, but because if you don't see the light then there's not a damn thing I or anyone else on this board can do about it...
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Name:
feministthought
Comment: I agree with you melodycool. I watched the first part of this series and it did not go in depth as I would have liked it to. I think that black women need to have a dialogue on issues that effect us without it turning into a discussion on how it will effect black men.
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Name:
ladybyrd
Comment: Bill Cosby said this in his town hall in Philly. I plan on watching this. My friends has already email round robins so that we are all watching. Iowa is 50/50 Clinton/Obama...can you believe white people in IOWA is willing to vote for Black American presidential candidate? This is a first in history of Iowa. OBAMA FOR CHANGE!
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Southernbelle, you never hear me whining about finding a mate. Sometimes it's best to step back rather than submit to BS...don't you think? I refuse to buy into the notion that I am nothing without any piece of man around at all times. This is why I do not care what they think. The truth of the matter is women fare much better alone than men do...so don't let anyone convince you otherwise as they try to gauge your level of desperation. Not saying that you are desperate, but all heteros are not pulling their hair out over the scarcity of men they prefer. This is how so many of us end up with problems up the wazzoo fixating on men and looking for social validation.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: Southernbelle, you never hear me whining about finding a mate. Sometimes it's best to step back rather than submit to BS...don't you think? I refuse to buy into the notion that I am nothing without any piece of man around at all times. This is why I do not care what they think. The truth of the matter is women fare much better alone than men do...so don't let anyone convince you otherwise as they try to gauge your level of desperation. Not saying that you are desperate, but all heteros are not pulling their hair out over the scarcity of men they prefer. This is how so many of us end up with problems up the wazzoo fixating on men and looking for social validation.
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Name:
MelodyCool
Comment: feministthought, as quiet as it's kept plenty of us know the time is ripe to begin dialogue about what affects...US! I'm very passionate and concerned about the fate of black girls and they must learn early on that it's ok to focus on our own unique situation. Black men are constantly upset with me for refusing to ignore what's before our very eyes. I bet you're already familiar with Abbey Lincoln's essay "Who Will Revere the Black Woman" included in "The Black Woman's Anthology". The title of that essay has been changed in the latest editions but the message is still relevant today. At the very end she said one day Black women will get mad enough to do something. That day has arrived and I know we are on a serious mission, and others sense it too. Our men are showing their own desperation by floating every stereotype imaginable, and telling the world we are unfit as women. Every time I speak of my strong desire to support and uplift Black girls, black men are invariably critical and feel I'm being discriminatory and hateful. It's like they want to snatch the rug from under our feet. No matter how many body blows...we keep getting up. I watched the program tonight and believe Rehema Ellis will handle the series in a sensitive manner. We'll see.
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