Sun, Jul 5, 2009
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JOSEPH C. PHILLIPS: The Hard Road
(June 1, 2006)
One of the students currently in trouble for attacking my conversationalist is a girl with a particularly difficult family life. Her story is not new. Her mother is a single parent with several children from different fathers and a history of mental health issues. As a result this young girl often finds herself missing school to parent her younger siblings. While other children are exploring the newness of their teenage years this girl has been handed responsibilities not of her making and is no doubt trying to cope as best she can with, it would appear, scarcely any help. It is little wonder that she snapped. The fact that this girl ended up in a hospital suffering high blood pressure and stress at the tender age of 13 may be a blessing in disguise. From the surface it would appear that without intervention of some kind a better life than the one she is living will be a long trek along a difficult road indeed.
Given the story the educator told me her pessimism is understandable. One can't help but feel a sense of trepidation given the deep singular focus and effort it will take for her eighth grade student to rise above her circumstances and build a life of significance.
However, this stands in stark contrast with the story of the educator's daughter, who accompanied her to the reception. Her daughter is a beautiful young woman entering her senior year in high school. Unlike the young student in her mother's class the doors to the world are wide-open to this young lady and she was filled with enthusiasm. She will attend a major university, will meet new and exciting people and barring some major distraction will have every opportunity to achieve her dream of becoming a journalist. It would be difficult not to feel excited and optimistic about the future of this country when speaking to her.
Life sometimes deals us cards from the bottom of the deck. Indeed for some it seems that cards are not dealt at all and yet regardless of the hand we are all expected to play as best we can. That is life and life is not fair. Some young girls break bread with famous authors while others are forced to raise their siblings while their mothers slip into madness.
Yet the difference between the two girls is more than circumstance it is also - and more significantly - a difference in hope.
Young people like this 8th grade girl must have faith that the hand of God will move in their lives, however, they also need hope in the form of human hands that will reach to offer them council and support. Hope is a hand that will guide young people towards the doors of opportunity -- that will offer encouragement in all areas of life. Hope will not alleviate the difficult work. Sweat and striving will always be necessary for success. Hope will, however, maintain a forward focus and will be the fuel that powers dreams.
I share the teachers concern, but I do not share her pessimism because experience has taught me that as a bit of Native American wisdom teaches: all roads are good. Hope tells me this is true even when the reality is that for some the road is made through walking.
Joseph C. Phillips is an actor/writer based in Los Angeles. His column appears regularly in newspapers and and he is a regular commentator on News and Notes with Ed Gordon on NPR. Phillips is the author of "He Talk Like A White Boy" now available wherever books are sold; it can also be purchased online here: http://subnorks.notlong.com. Contact him at: Joseph@josephcphillips.com
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