EURweb |
ASK ADVICE CHICK: Answers to YOUR Dating, Sex, Life, & Love Questions!
Dear Advice Chick,
*I am in a great and loving relationship, no drama, some stupid disagreements, (that are always laughed about later), and lots of love. This man is like a breath of fresh air compared to the losers I have dated. He is a little younger and needs a little work with the whole responsibility thing, but what man doesn't?
I know your probably saying, what's the problem? Well here it is. Before he came along I have decided that I don't want any more kids. I only have one 14yr old daughter, and he has a 1yr old daughter that he does not see (not his choice). The problem is he wants another child and I have thought of it at first but now I see my friends with there baby's and I be like oh no I don't want to start over again. I have expressed this to him and asked him if this is something that is really important, because I'm having a change of heart. He says its okay we don't have to have any kids but I think he is just telling me that to make me happy because that is who he is. We have discussed marriage and everything and I truly believe that this will last. I just want to make him as happy as he has made me and I know that he will be a great father to any child that I give him. Now I know you can't make this decision for me but I just need some advice. Don't get me wrong I will love my child and do the best in power to give this child everything like I did my first, but I just don't know. I am gonna be 30 next year and my child is almost grown I don't know if I want to start over HELP!!!
Advice Chick replies,
Many men DON’T need a little work with the whole responsibility thing. If he isn’t seeing his daughter (unacceptable and HIS choice 100%) how can you be sure he won’t be seeing the child you might have for him a year or so from now?
While he wants another child, does he also want a wife? You and he have discussed marriage huh? Well, first comes love, then come marriage, then maybe you’ll want to push a baby carriage – and maybe not.
He’s younger – how much younger? You’re 29 so how old is this guy? Lord knows I want you to be happy, but I don’t know about this one. It’s not normal to want a baby when you aren’t seeing/taking care of the one poor little girl you have. It’s not normal to even entertain the thought of having a baby for a poor excuse of a man who doesn’t see his current child. Please give him a copy of Steve Ivory’s column from Tuesday (9/19/6).
Does this touch a nerve? Damn right it does. Men have to be responsible for their children, and we have to be responsible enough to avoid men who avoid their children.
Do YOU have a question for Advice Chick? Visit http://www.advicechick.com right now to ask!
----------
Media / syndication inquiries? Call 312-893-0538 – Advicechick@ Ameritech.net
Ask Advice Chick about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING related to dating, sex, love, and life! Kimberly Williams (THE resident dating expert at EURweb.com) calls on over 10 years of dating and relationship industry experience. Read past columns and more at http://www.advicechick.com
-------------------
Freddie Jackson's new CD "Transitions" in
stores everywhere on September 26. Includes
a collector's bonus DVD of 17 of Freddie's greatest
videos including "Rock Me Tonight" and "You Are
My Lady." Also includes a special tribute to the
late Luther Vandross - "Superstar/Wind
Beneath My Wings." Available on
Orpheus Music
