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REMY MA SENTENCED TO 8 YEARS: Jailhouse wedding called off after fiancé was found with handcuff key.
*The proverbial book was thrown at Remy Ma yesterday when she was sentenced to eight years in prison for shooting an acquaintance over missing money. And adding insult to injury, she began her bid as a single woman.
The rapper attempted to marry her rapper/fiancé Papoose before beginning her sentence, but Monday's jailhouse ceremony was cancelled after he was discovered holding a handcuff key and thrown in a cell.
"The key that was found today easily opened handcuffs that we and other law enforcement officials use," a prison official told the New York Daily News. "The visitor was sanctioned by not being able to visit Rikers Island again for six months. He was asked to leave."
Papoose, however, says jail officials were already aware of the key, which he describes as a skeleton key that has hung from his keychain without repercussion each time he has visited Remy at Rikers Island. "The handcuff thing was ridiculous," Pap told SOHH.com. "The law states, if I carried a handcuff key into a prison, I would have been arrested."
Marlon, one half of Remy's management team, suggested to SOHH that jail officials were simply using Pap's skeleton key as an excuse to cancel the wedding.
"Pap has not missed one visit while she was at Rikers," Marlon told SOHH. "Every C.O. knows him. The skeleton key thing was bogus. …[Pap] knew something was up when they asked him to come back. He never made it to the chapel. The officers told Remy they had to reschedule. No one told her what happened. She didn't find out until she spoke with Pap."
When asked about waiting out the six months and rescheduling the wedding, Pap told reporters that he and Remy were already official anyway.
"We're already married," he said.
Before sentencing the following day, Smith appealed for leniency by tearfully describing how she was raised in homeless shelters, "surrounded by poverty and drugs and violence and failure."
"Remy Ma is not even close to who I really am. I'm not a thug," she said. "I'm not a threat or a menace to society, and I still have so much to offer."
But prosecutor Michael McIntosh argued Remy had a habit of traveling with a loaded weapon and said something like this "was bound to happen one day."
Judge Rena Uviller ultimately sided with the prosecution, referring to Remy as "an extremely angry young woman whose anger is completely out of control" before handing down the sentence.
In March, Remy was convicted of assault, weapons possession and attempted coercion. Her lawyer, Ivan Fisher, tried to argue that the shooting in the early hours of July 14, 2007, was accidental, and that the victim, Makeda Barnes-Joseph, was exaggerating the facts to win a large sum in a separate civil suit. Fisher also tried to argue that Barnes-Joseph had taken $3,000 from her and that her gun went off as the pair struggled over her purse.
The bullet pierced Barnes-Joseph's colon and hit her rectum and sent her to a hospital for three weeks.
LEBRON CURSES OUT MOM ON NATIONAL TV: NBA star screams to Gloria 'sit yo' a** down' after she tried to defend him following a foul.
*A mama's love has no boundaries, even during a nationally-televised NBA game when she feels her son is the victim of an excessive foul.
Cleveland Cavaliers star LeBron James was driving to the basket in Game 4 of his team's playoff series with Boston when opponent Paul Pierce wrapped him up and momentum carried them both into the courtside crowd under the basket.
Gloria James, sitting near where her son had been dragged out of bounds, jumped up to his defense and started screaming at Pierce. Any good lip reader could see that LeBron glared at his mother and shouted "Sit your
a** down!" before walking back onto the court.
After his team's 88-77 victory, James was asked to explain his harsh language, which yesterday made its way onto the Internet and cable news outlets.
He said: "Even though that is my mother, you can’t have fans going after players like that. The Commissioner doesn’t care if it is your mother or your kids or anybody, you can't allow fans and players to get involved like that. I can’t afford for my mom not to be at every last one of my games. I told her to sit down in language I shouldn’t have used. Thank God today wasn’t Mother’s Day.”
LeBron James tells Mom to "Sit Your A** Down": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl_9z35fz54
FINGER POINTING DURING KELLY JURY SELECTION: Defense accused prosecution of striking blacks from jury pool. Eight jurors selected so far.
*Five more jurors were chosen Tuesday for R. Kelly's child pornography trial in Chicago following a nine-hour process on Monday that yielded three citizens to serve on the high-profile case.
On Monday, the prosecution struck three potential jurors, two African American and one white, prompting defense attorneys to accuse them of intentionally removing minorities from the jury pool. Cook County Judge Vincent Gaughan, though, rejected the defense's contentions.
The next afternoon, Gaughan made mention of the similarities between the people booted by the defense. "So," the judge said, "all white males."
Kelly's attorney, Ed Genson, "didn't bat an eye," according to the Chicago Sun-Times. Genson told the judge: "I don't look at people like that.
I see one color."
The three jurors selected Monday are a pastor's wife, a father with two young children and a middle-age black man who describes himself as a Christian.
The father had initially tried to get excused because of a work conflict. He wrote on his juror questionnaire that he believed Kelly was guilty but would keep an open mind. He also admitted he would have problems with the child pornography aspects of the case.
"I have two little kids," he said, "and child pornography is as low as it gets."
The second juror is middle-age African-American woman, whose husband is a pastor. The judge told the woman that the case would involve the laws of man and not God's law and asked her if she would be able to judge Kelly on the law. She answered she could.
The third juror, the self-described Christian, said he believed he could give Kelly a fair trial, though he said he didn't like seeing pornographic material on display. He only knows Kelly because of the hit song "I Believe I Can Fly," though he suspects his kids might know more about him. "I don't know about his reputation," he said. "I know one song that he made."
The fourth juror, chosen yesterday, is a white, female college student who is studying criminal justice in college and told the judge she wants to be a police officer. Both her boyfriend and her father work as security guards. She said she believes in the justice system and wants to make a positive contribution to it.
Rounding out the eight chosen so far are a teacher's assistant, a married man in his 40s, an investment firm compliance officer and a man with prior jury experience. The eight jurors so far consist of five men and three women, and are split evenly between black and white members.
ISAIAH WASHINGTON FILES COMPLAINT OVER IMAGE: Actor runs to SAG over use of his image in "Grey's Anatomy."
*Isaiah Washington has filed a formal complaint with the Screen Actors Guild against his ex-employer ABC for allowing his image to be used in last week's episode of "Grey's Anatomy."
The actor, who was fired from the show in 2007 amid controversy that he used a homophobic slur, claims the producers never got proper consent to use his head shot, which was featured in a newspaper article about his character receiving a prestigious surgeon's award.
Washington's attorney, Peter Nelson, sent notices to ABC and SAG indicating the alleged inappropriate use of his image, his manager Howard Bragman told the Associated Press.
"They have the rights of the character to advance the story, but not the image," he said, adding that he expects this matter to be resolved via a "financial settlement."
WNBC ANCHOR DROPS F-BOMB ON THE AIR: Sue Simmons apparently thought her mic was cut off.
*Veteran news anchor Sue Simmons of New York's NBC affiliate WNBC was caught slipping during a tease Monday evening when she thought her microphone was cut off and blurted out the f-word.
During the 10 p.m. hour, Simmons was teasing an 11 o'clock news story about rising grocery prices when the footage laid over her voice switched to a cruise ship that had a passenger go overboard.
That's when Simmons shouted "What the f**k are you doing?" Eight seconds of silence followed.
Simmons apologized to the viewers at the start of the 11 p.m.
broadcast, stating: "I have to acknowledge an unfortunate incident ... I used a word that many people find offensive. It was a mistake I made and I'm truly sorry."
WNBC's Sue Simmons Drops F-Bomb - May 12, 2008:
http://www.redlasso.com/ClipPlayer.aspx?id=f0fb9593-93c2-4362-9717-5ab69777fb0f
Simmons apologizes on 11 O'clock Newscast:
http://www.redlasso.com/ClipPlayer.aspx?id=398c4095-276a-4267-beef-3f3c3636aad7
MARIAH AND ELLEN DISH ABOUT WEDDING: Mimi says she and Nick Cannon will have a second ceremony for their friends and family.
*Mariah Carey stopped by the "Ellen DeGeneres Show" and tried to explain to the host why she wasn't invited to the Caribbean for her top secret marriage to Nick Cannon.
"Instead of trying to be like, 'you're invited, but, shhh, don't tell anybody,' we're just going to have another [wedding] next year," Carey told DeGeneres on her talk show Tuesday. "[Nick's] plan is to have one every year."
The singer assured Ellen that a second wedding will be held here in the States to be attended by friends and family. Those who witnessed the first beachside ceremony, she continues, were, "mainly people there to do my hair and help me with the dress."
Both Carey and Cannon only brought along three friends each because, "we wanted to be on the beach and we didn’t want other people taking pictures," said Carey.
Carey said she's found the man she wants to have kids with. "My parents divorced when I was three and I didn't have many examples of what was the 'norm,' " she says. But with Cannon, she says, "I found the right person."
Both Carey and Cannon attended Ellen's 50th birthday party over the weekend held on the Warner Bros. lot in Burbank, where DeGeneres just moved her show from nearby NBC studios. Clips of the celebration will air on Friday's episode.
HALLE TALKS POST-BIRTH WORKOUT SCHEDULE: Actress stepped up the cardio and boosted veggie intake.
*Halle Berry has decided to tell the world about the diet and exercise plan she used to shed pounds gained before the March 16th birth of her daughter, Nahla Ariela Aubry.
The 41-year-old works out for 60 minutes, five days a week with trainer Ramona Brazaga. Their sessions consist of three cardio segments – the elliptical machine, kickboxing and a stairs or hill climb – as well as a strength-training routine that include abdominal work and leg exercises.
As for her diet, Berry says she eats lots of vegetables, lean proteins and complex carbohydrates, as well as drinking a large quantity of water.
AL REYNOLDS FIRES BACK AT MEDIA: Star Jones' ex posts a missive on his MySpace page.
*In a new post on his MySpace page, Al Reynolds remains tight-lipped regarding the reasons behind his split from Star Jones, but he has lots to say about the "barrage" of media reports in the wake of the divorce announcement.
"If you think you are having a tough day, may I propose you walk in my shoes for a few hours," he writes. "In my mind, it feels like 'Dump on Al Month.' And I'm not having fun yet. I have been called a gigolo, a freeloader, unemployed, a sham and many other things that don't bear repeating. People on television, radio and the internet have spoken disparagingly of my life, my sexuality, my career and my integrity."
Reynolds, a professor at Florida Memorial University, says that few people truly know him, and may have some misconceptions from news reporting of his recent club-hopping.
"I indeed work very hard as a professor, business owner, doctoral student and author. I play hard too," he says. "I make no apologies for that. A guy is entitled to a little fun, after all."
Reynolds, 37, says the media has "barraged" his home, his friends and his family, including his 79-year-old mother, but he remains convinced that he should not discuss the divorce.
"As much as I want to defend myself, it seems like a silly and futile exercise," he writes. "It's clear that the media doesn't want to let the truth get in the way of a good story. I hate to ruin their fun. I take great comfort in the fact that my loved ones and those people who really know me continue to love and respect me."
He expresses sadness for his breakup with Jones, who filed for divorce last month without giving a reason.
"I know in my heart that I entered my marriage with love and the best of intentions and leave it with great sadness that it didn't work," writes Reynolds.
In closing, the former banker writes: "What I want people to know is that I am not the caricature portrayed by the media. I am complex, contradictory and capable of great intelligence but also remarkable stupidity. In other words, I am a human being. To me, labels are for clothes, not people. So ... Please don't try to define me; don't try to categorize me; and most of all, don't label me. Instead, JUST GET TO KNOW ME. And if you see me, just call me Al."
PASSING STRANGE NOMINATED FOR 7 TONYS: Fishburne, Merkerson pick up acting nods.
*Passing Strange has been nominated for seven Tony Awards, including best musical of the Broadway season, while Laurence Fishburne and S. Epatha Merkerson each picked up a nod in the acting categories.
Passing Strange tells the story of a young black bohemian who, in search for self and home, charts a course for "the real" through sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll. He leaves his middle class home—and his mother—in Los Angeles to find out about life in Amsterdam and Berlin. The musical faces competition in the musical category from "In the Heights," "Cry-Baby" and "Xanadu."
The play has also been named Best Musical of the 2007-08 season by the New York Drama Critics' Circle, which comprises 22 drama critics from daily newspapers, magazines, and wire services based in the New York metropolitan area. Those awards will be presented at a cocktail reception to be held on Monday, May 19.
Passing Strange also has the distinction of being the first Broadway show to get a digital exclusive release, when the original cast album arrives on iTunes May 27. The actual CD will be available in stores sometime in July. The album was recorded on April 14 at the Belasco Theatre in front of a live audience.
Meanwhile, Fishburne received a Best Actor Tony nomination for his role as late Supreme Court Justice Thurgood Marshall in Thurgood. He'll compete against Patrick Stewart, the title character in "Macbeth"; Mark Rylance, "Boeing-Boeing"; Ben Daniels, "Les Liaisons Dangereuses"; and Rufus Sewell, "Rock 'n' Roll."
Merkerson, who starred in "Come Back, Little Sheba," was nominated for Best Actress, along with Deanna Dunagan and Amy Morton of "August: Osage County"; Eve Best in "The Homecoming"; and Kate Fleetwood, as the murderous wife in "Macbeth."
A revival of Rodgers and Hammerstein's South Pacific took a leading 11 nominations, followed by Sunday in the Park With George with nine. Receiving seven nominations along with Passing Strange are August: Osage County and the revival of Gypsy.
Nominations for the 62nd annual awards show were announced Tuesday morning in New York. The winners in 26 competitive categories will be announced June 15 in a three-hour CBS telecast from Radio City Music Hall.
SMOKEY, DENZEL AMONG APOLLO HONOREES: Theater's Fourth Annual Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony set for June.
*The Apollo Theater Foundation, Inc. will host its fourth annual Hall of Fame Induction & Gala on Monday, June 2. The affair will include a red carpet, a tribute concert and awards ceremony and a grand tented after-party.
Hosted by comedienne and actress Wanda Sykes, this year's event, in preparation for the Apollo's 75th Anniversary, will commemorate the life and music of Apollo Legend Smokey Robinson with a ceremony inducting the performer into the Apollo Legends Hall of Fame where he will join predecessors Gladys Knight, James Brown, Ella Fitzgerald and Little Richard.
The awards ceremony will continue with the Ruby Dee & Ossie Davis Arts and Humanitarian Award given to Pauletta and Denzel Washington as well as appearances by the presenters of the evening including Oscar nominated actress, Ruby Dee, Oscar nominated actor, Terrence Howard and Grammy-Award winner, Janet Jackson.
The corporate award will be presented to Verizon for their ongoing commitment to the community.
The evening will be held at the historic, legendary Apollo Theater and feature performances and appearances by India.Arie, Nnenna Freelon, and Earth Wind & Fire. The event will culminate with the Apollo Supper Club -- a stylish lounge atmosphere featuring the generous gourmet creations of celebrity chef, Alexander Smalls prepared by Great Performances, plentiful libations courtesy of Belvedere and late-night dancing to music spun by DJ D-Nice.
Proceeds will support Apollo's 74-year legacy and its initiatives for emerging artists, education programs and community outreach efforts in New York City and beyond. Tickets are available for $1,000. To purchase tickets or to make a donation to the Apollo Theater Foundation, Inc., call 800.618.3444.
STEVIE WONDER TO TOUR AGAIN THIS SUMMER: Singer lines up more than a dozen North American shows.
*Stevie Wonder returns to the road this summer with a string of North American shows to begin June 18 in Wantagh, NY.
The Motown icon will travel around the eastern U.S. through the end of the month. In July, he'll head west for shows in Colorado, Nevada, California, Washington and British Columbia.
Wonder's return to the touring circuit after 12 years was inspired in part by his mother, Lula Mae Hardaway, who passed away in 2006. Tour details are listed below:
June 2008
18 - Wantagh, NY - Nikon at Jones Beach Theater
19 - Uncasville, CT - Mohegan Sun Arena
21 - Atlantic City, NJ - Trump Taj Mahal
22 - Mansfield, MA - Tweeter Center for the Performing Arts
24 - Clarkston, MI - DTE Energy Music Theatre
26 - Milwaukee, WI - Marcus Amphitheater/Summerfest
28 - Chicago, IL - Grant Park
July 2008
1 - Englewood, CO - Fiddler's Green Amphitheatre
4 - Reno, NV - Reno Events Center
5 - Mountain View, CA - Shoreline Amphitheatre
8 - Concord, CA - Sleep Train Pavilion
11 - Auburn, WA - White River Amphitheatre
12 - Vancouver, British Columbia - General Motors Place
P.O.V. BEGINS SEASON WITH SLAVE TRADE DOC: Filmmaker finds out descendants were the largest slave traders in U.S. history.
*PBS's P.O.V. series begins its 21st year on PBS Tuesday, June 24 at 10 p.m. with "Traces of the Trade: A Story From the Deep North."
First-time filmmaker Katrina Browne makes a troubling discovery—her New England ancestors were the largest slave-trading family in U.S. history. She and nine fellow descendants set off to retrace the Triangle Trade: from their old hometown in Rhode Island to slave forts in Ghana to sugar plantation ruins in Cuba.
Step by step, they uncover the vast extent of Northern complicity in slavery while also stumbling through the minefield of contemporary race relations. In this bicentennial year of the U.S. abolition of the slave trade, "Traces of the Trade" offers powerful new perspectives on the black/white divide.
“In 'Traces of the Trade,' we wanted to ask this question: What is our responsibility?” says Browne. “I’m less concerned with understanding the extreme inhumanity of my ancestors than with understanding the mundane, ordinary complicity of the majority of New Englanders who participated in a slave-based economy. That had more parallels to me and my family today: well-intentioned white folks who are still part of systems that do harm.
It’s important to roll up our sleeves to deal with what we all inherited from our country’s history.
“I hope that the film invites Americans into heartfelt and honest dialogue on these core questions: What, concretely, is the legacy of slavery––for diverse whites, for diverse blacks, for diverse others? Who owes who what for the sins of the fathers of this country? What would repair—spiritual and material—look like, and what would it take?”
P.O.V. is broadcast Tuesdays at 10 p.m. June through October on PBS, with primetime specials in the fall and winter. The Traces of the Trade companion Web site, (www.pbs.org/pov/traces), offers a streaming video trailer of the film, an interview with Katrina Browne (video, podcast and text); a list of related Web sites, organizations and books; a downloadable discussion guide and classroom activity; and special features.
ROBERT TOWNSEND HOSTS 'MASTER CLASS': Seminar series on filmmaking to be held at LA's Crenshaw Christian Center.
*Filmmaker Robert Townsend is back by popular demand at Crenshaw Christian Center’s (CCC) The Master Class. Pastor Fred Price, Jr. of CCC will host the actor-director-writer-producer at his special seminar series in Los Angeles from 1 p.m. – 4 p.m. on Saturday, May 24 at the church (7901 South Vermont Ave.).
Last month, Townsend treated nearly 300 guests and members of CCC to a “spirited” discussion about the art of filmmaking. The seminar was half comedy performance and half instruction as the comedian mixed humor with information on pitching, producing, and film writing, featuring film clips from his anthology of shows.
Attendees are encouraged to come prepared to pitch and be critiqued by Townsend. Admission is $50. Proceeds will go to the Robert Townsend Foundation and CCC’s Blue Print. For more information, call (323) 758-3777 ext. 4645.
HENRY SIMMONS OFFERS ADVICE TO LA STUDENTS: Actor visits high school and touts importance of higher education.
*Actor Henry Simmons led a panel of stars and professionals in an event at Dorsey High School in Los Angeles called “Peace Through Education.”
Each panelist encouraged the students to stay focused in taking their education seriously and to take positive steps toward getting a higher education despite the obstacles they face from peers and family.
Others who came to uplift and encourage the students included actress/comedienne Beth Payne (“BET Sunday Best”), Hot 92.3 DJs Victor Zaragoza and Josefa Salinas, Charmaine Jefferson (Executive Director of the California African American Museum) and Hollywood entertainment lawyer Lisa Boykin.
Simmons urged students to recognize God in their life and to have faith in themselves and to never give up.
Photographer/publicist Steven Williams, who organized the event, served as the master of ceremonies with Publicist Roz Stevenson.
NO DEATH ROW FOR SEAN TAYLOR MURDER SUSPECTS: Prosecutors will not seek death penalty because accused shooter was under 18.
*Prosecutors said Monday they will not seek the death penalty against four people charged with murdering Washington Redskins star Sean Taylor because the accused shooter was a minor when the crime was committed.
The U.S. Supreme Court has ruled that people cannot be executed for crimes committed when they're under 18, and it's a well established legal principle that others involved in the same case as a minor cannot face the ultimate penalty if they are less directly responsible.
Assistant State Attorney Reid Rubin filed notice Friday that the death penalty will be waived, reports the Associated Press. That means the four suspects could get a maximum of life in prison if convicted of first-degree murder after a trial scheduled to begin Aug. 25.
Eric Rivera Jr., who turned 18 last month, was 17 at the time police say he shot Taylor during a botched robbery at the Pro Bowl safety's Miami-area home in November. Taylor, 24, died of massive blood loss after he was shot in the upper leg.
The Taylor family accepted prosecutor's explanation for the move, a family spokesman said.
"All the co-defendants can't be subject to the death penalty if the
(alleged) shooter is not," said Richard Sharpstein, a lawyer who has acted as spokesman for the Taylor family. "There are no issues of discretion here. There's no choice."
ITTY BITTY BITS: Ne-Yo CD; Freeman avoids fans; Tavis in Columbus; Radio One execs bounce; Spliff Star arrested; Speedknot Mobstaz CD.
*The release date of Ne-Yo's third Def Jam album, "Year of the Gentleman," has been pushed back from June 24 to Aug. 5 so that he can squeeze in additional songs for the project. The set features production by longtime Ne-Yo colleagues Stargate, Christopher "Tricky" Stewart, J.R. Rotem and members of Ne-Yo's Atlanta-based Compound Entertainment crew. "Closer," the Stargate-produced first single, is currently No. 54 on the Billboard Hot 100 and No. 41 on the Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs chart.
*Some theatergoers are throwing hate darts at Morgan Freeman for refusing to sign autographs after his performances in Broadway's "The Country Girl." When Morgan exits each night, he has burly guards yelling "No pictures! No autographs!" according to Janet Charlton. He exits in his car without even acknowledging the people waiting for him. His co-star Peter Gallagher, on the other hand, was described as very friendly, and he made an effort to accommodate everyone.
*Talk show host Tavis Smiley will join Nationwide Mutual Insurance Company in a community forum in Columbus, Ohio on May 17. The event is part of a five-city tour promoting his message of economic empowerment and financial literacy. There will be workshops on insurance, financial planning and recruitment. The forum will take place from 9:30 a.m. to 10 a.m. at the Hyatt Regency Hotel Private Dining Room 2nd floor.
*Two top executives at Radio One have decided to step down from their posts, reports Redding News Review. Alejandro A. Clabiorne, vice president of marketing for the company, has given his notice, while Lee Michaels, national program director for Syndication One News/Talk, has already left, three sources tell the trade mag. Their departures come on the heels of talk radio star Joe Madison's exit last week. Madison, who is ranked one of the top 20 talk radio show hosts in the nation, will now be working directly for rival XM 169 The Power starting in June.
*Busta Rhymes' hype man Spliff Star was arrested in Sweden for suspicion of drug possession. During a police raid on the artists' hotel rooms, an unidentified substance was found among Spliff's belongings. The stage sidekick, born William Lewis, was arrested after performing with Rhymes Saturday at Berns. He was released from police custody after leaving a urine sample, which will be tested for drugs.
*Twista is launching his Get Money Gang (GMG) Imprint under Koch Records with a new album release from Speedknot Mobstaz. Titled "Mobstability II: Nation Bizness," the set is due for release Tuesday, May 27, led by the single “Money To Blow.” [Click here to view video.] The group will promote the album as part of the Rock the Vote Tour scheduled to hit over 20 cities throughout the United States.
EUR FILM REVIEW: Mister Lonely
Michael Jackson Impersonator Takes Refuge in the Company of Other Wannabes
Film Review by Kam Williams
*A Michael Jackson impersonator (Diego Luna) has been eking out a living in Paris by dancing in parks, on the streets and any place his agent (Leos Carax) can book him.
However, other than perfecting a few of the Prince of Pop's trademark moves and donning a felt fedora and one glove, he doesn't really look anything like him.
Consequently, the best gigs he can get are jobs like his current one, performing for the elderly at a senior citizen center.
As fate would have it, also entertaining there that day was a hauntingly-beautiful Marilyn Monroe look-a-like (Samantha Morton). Sensing that Michael is a lost and lonely soul, she invites him to accompany her home to a castle tucked away in the Scottish Highlands where she lives with a host of other celebrity wannabes, including her mustachioed husband, Charlie Chaplin (Dennis Lavant), and their mop-topped, six year-old daughter, Shirley Temple (Esme Creed-Miles).
Michael takes her up on the generous offer, as much because he was instantly smitten, as for the company of like-minded oddballs. Upon their arrival at the seaside estate, Marilyn matter-of-factly announces, "I found a Michael,"
whereupon the stranger finds himself welcomed into a community of losers pretending to be everyone from Madonna (Melita Morgan) to Sammy Davis, Jr. (Jason Pennycooke) to James Dean (Joseph Morgan) to Abraham Lincoln (Richard
Strange) to Buckwheat (Michael-Joel Stuart) to the Pope (James Fox) to Little Red Riding Hood (Rachel Korine) to the Queen of England (Anita Pallenberg) to The Three Stooges, Moe (Daniel Rovai), Larry (Mal Whiteley) and Curly (Nigel Cooper).
The grand plan of this motley crew is to attract a big crowd of the curious to the vaudeville show they plan to put on, ala the Little Rascals. Meanwhile, a subplot revolves around the simmering sexual tensions which arise between Michael and Marilyn after she informs her hubby that he reminds her more of Hitler than Chaplin.
Unfortunately, writer/director Harmony Korine runs out of ideas of what else to do with his assemblage of familiar faces. Instead of a sensible storyline, he settles for visually-bracing cinematography, courtesy of a collage of wide-angled mob scenes along with equally- arresting land, air and seascapes. At the 11th hour, Korine pull a rabbit out of his hat via a development so shocking it doesn't quite fit with the picture's previously relatively light-hearted tone.
And neither cameos by magician David Blaine and director Werner Herzog nor the haunting strains of Bobby Vinton on the title track prove to be enough to make the meaningless meanderings of these famous-faced misfits worthwhile. For, once the novelty of all the celebrity impersonations wears off, the film never gives you much of a reason to care about the predicaments of its cardboard characters.
Fair (1.5 stars)
Unrated
Running time: 113 minutes
Studi IFC Films
EUR FILM REVIEW: Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead
Musical Horror Comedy Funniest Film of Year Thus Far
Film Review by Kam Williams
*General Lee Roy (Robin Watkins), a rank and file member of the Ku Klux Klan, also happens to be the CEO of American Chicken Bunker, a leading chain of fast food restaurants.
The General has decided to go forward with plans to build his next franchise atop a sacred Native American burial ground, in spite of the presence of a plaque warning that, "Desecrators will be cursed to the full extent of the ancient tribal law."
Ignoring some very vocal local opposition, he proceeds to bulldoze the graveyard, unaware that disturbing the remains of the Tromahawk Nation will trigger freaky fallout no one could have ever anticipated.
For, the spirits of the ancestors magically merge with the fowl being served at the restaurant, turning the birds into a revenge-minded horde of man-eating zombies.
This is the point of departure of Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead, the latest offering from Lloyd Kaufman (The Toxic Avenger) of Troma Entertainment. This go-round, the legendary director has fashioned an alternately hilarious and shocking, gender-bending, genre-mixing, musical horror flick which defies description at every turn.
And while thoroughly entertaining you with everything ranging from blood-curling screams to gruesome displays of vivisection to a topless lesbian revue to bodily function humor to politically-incorrect ethnic jokes, the movie saves plenty of time to deliver some deadly serious messages about consumerism, sexism, racism and, above all, about animal rights .
The picture stars Jason Yachanin as Arbie, a recent high school grad who can't afford to go to college because his mom's retarded and his father's blind. Meanwhile, his departing girlfriend, Wendy (Kate Graham), promises to remain loyal while away at school, only to fall in love with a gay, activist classmate, Micki (Allyson Sereboff).
The plot thickens after Arbie discovers that Wendy's cheating on him when the two show up to picket the new restaurant on opening day. In an impulsive jealous reaction, he applies for a job there, and soon joins a staff with curious names evocative of famous fast food franchises. For instance, there's store manager Denny (Joshua Olatunde), and co-workers Carl Jr. (Caleb Emerson) and Paco Bell (Khalid Rivera).
What ensues is a jaw dropping combination of silly, sexy and sadistic skits not to be missed. Accolades are in order for director Kaufman (who also plays Arbie's elderly alter ego) for dreaming up a neverending array of imaginative ways to knock off the cast members in his high attrition rate production.
More importantly, he very powerfully drives home the point that it's high time humans question the selfish practice of mass-production and harvesting of animal flesh merely for our consumption. I'm sure it sounds oxymoronic, but like a kinky cross of John Waters and John Woo, Poultrygeist is a sophisticated splatter flick as likely to enlighten as to keep an audience in stitches.
Excellent (4 stars)
Unrated
Running time: 99 minutes
Studi Troma Entertainment
EUR MOTIVATIONAL NOTE
“Let us become the change we seek in this world. ” – Mohandas Gandhi
CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS
May 14: Singer Raphael Saadiq (Tony! Toni! Tone!) is 42. Singer Natalie Appleton of All Saints is 35. Singer Shanice is 35.
WEBSITE OF THE WEEK
This blog is the home of entertainment writer and author Shelia M. Goss. It's a blog with a flair for the dramatic (www.sheliagoss.com/blog).
Submit your favorite Web site to us along with a 15-20 word (or less) description to info@eurweb.com.
BLACK HISTORY
May 14, 1963: Arthur Ashe, at 22, becomes the first African American to make the U.S. Davis Cup tennis team. (Source: www.BlackFacts.com)
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